Megan and Boots (GA)
Member Since 2015
I can barely compose thoughts now, but since so many chimed in to try to help the past days as Boots has been struggling, I wanted to let everyone know that we helped him cross the bridge today.
The past year has been a roller coaster, and the past months had gotten worse, leading up to the past couple weeks. Nothing seemed to help him turn that corner as we had hoped, so we made the decision to let him finally find his peace today.
I can't even say it was ultimately a difficult decision. Painful - yes, but not difficult. He was ready. I could see it in his eyes. He started telling me last week but we weren't ready to stop fighting then. And he tried too; boy did he try. But too much in his sweet body was just too badly broken in the end, and we had to let him finally rest. We were with him every moment, and he left this world being bathed in love. Even gone now, he is still so very, very loved.
I don't know exactly how to go on now. Everyone here knows how all-encompassing our babies can become in our lives. I won't know what to do with myself every day at 8am and 8pm. I no longer will have a reason to duck out of work every day at lunchtime to go home and check his blood sugar. I'll need to get used to feeding prep time for the civvies taking seconds instead of the minutes of daily pills, powders, BG checks, and shots. I feel empty and without purpose. I know this feeling will pass, or at least fade, but at the moment, the pain and loss is excruciating.
Boots came into my life as a debonair young man in 2004. He's been with me through thick and thin, never once ceasing to bring me pure love and joy. He was and is my soul cat. His eyes bored into mine with each look. He knew me, and I knew him, through and through. I don't remember how to live without him, but I'll just keep putting one foot in front of the other until I can figure it out.
Thanks to everyone who helped us on this FD journey - helped us on those scary <50 readings, helped us get OTJ for a few sweet months, helped us on the bad days when I knew I could always turn here for guidance and support. I don't know that I have ever experienced a community like this with so much knowledge, kinship, and love to give. I don't plan on leaving for good, as I want to continue to see the great many successes that can be achieved, and to cry along with those who will also experience the sadness and loss.
I'll likely check in in the next couple of days once I wrap my head around all the meds and supplies and such that we can unload.
I love you, Boots. You're my Boo-Bear, my Pudding, my Sweet Baby Boy. I wouldn't be me without having you. You truly made me better. I love you forever.
The past year has been a roller coaster, and the past months had gotten worse, leading up to the past couple weeks. Nothing seemed to help him turn that corner as we had hoped, so we made the decision to let him finally find his peace today.
I can't even say it was ultimately a difficult decision. Painful - yes, but not difficult. He was ready. I could see it in his eyes. He started telling me last week but we weren't ready to stop fighting then. And he tried too; boy did he try. But too much in his sweet body was just too badly broken in the end, and we had to let him finally rest. We were with him every moment, and he left this world being bathed in love. Even gone now, he is still so very, very loved.
I don't know exactly how to go on now. Everyone here knows how all-encompassing our babies can become in our lives. I won't know what to do with myself every day at 8am and 8pm. I no longer will have a reason to duck out of work every day at lunchtime to go home and check his blood sugar. I'll need to get used to feeding prep time for the civvies taking seconds instead of the minutes of daily pills, powders, BG checks, and shots. I feel empty and without purpose. I know this feeling will pass, or at least fade, but at the moment, the pain and loss is excruciating.
Boots came into my life as a debonair young man in 2004. He's been with me through thick and thin, never once ceasing to bring me pure love and joy. He was and is my soul cat. His eyes bored into mine with each look. He knew me, and I knew him, through and through. I don't remember how to live without him, but I'll just keep putting one foot in front of the other until I can figure it out.
Thanks to everyone who helped us on this FD journey - helped us on those scary <50 readings, helped us get OTJ for a few sweet months, helped us on the bad days when I knew I could always turn here for guidance and support. I don't know that I have ever experienced a community like this with so much knowledge, kinship, and love to give. I don't plan on leaving for good, as I want to continue to see the great many successes that can be achieved, and to cry along with those who will also experience the sadness and loss.
I'll likely check in in the next couple of days once I wrap my head around all the meds and supplies and such that we can unload.
I love you, Boots. You're my Boo-Bear, my Pudding, my Sweet Baby Boy. I wouldn't be me without having you. You truly made me better. I love you forever.
I'm glad it wasn't a difficult decision for you, even though it is devastating. Having a friend by your side for 15 years is a long time, I bet you don't remember life without him. Im not sure you ever figure out how to go on, you just do. 
