12/4 Esse AMPS 183

Lauren & Esse

Member Since 2025
Yesterday's thread!

Warning, venting ahead:
Ugh, I know I shouldn't be judging our success by Esse's dose (vs. his BG numbers), but increasing back to a dose we haven't seen since early August is frustrating for me. I know I've seen @Brianna & Xander talk about this before, but every time we increase I can't help but do the mental math of "okay, if he had perfect numbers starting TODAY, here's how long it would take to taper down to an OTJ trial." I also find myself wondering if there's any explanation for what's happening except for that his pancreas isn't working and he needs more insulin (e.g. "Could he be sick? Or his teeth? He has no symptoms, but..." or "Could this insulin vial already be bad? I did get them at the same time and they were out of the fridge for a couple hours, but they were unopened and in a cooler, so..." etc. etc.). Just feels like we were doing so well in October and it's been getting worse, not better, since then. Making negative-progress.
Okay, vent over.

Hope everyone has a great day! We're potentially expecting snow tomorrow. When it snows we like to let Esse out the back door onto the deck to remind him that outside is bad and scary and he should be happy living inside. 😂 Here's a throwback from January as a palate cleanser from my whining. He made it to here and then waited for rescue.

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Yesterday's thread!

Warning, venting ahead:
Ugh, I know I shouldn't be judging our success by Esse's dose (vs. his BG numbers), but increasing back to a dose we haven't seen since early August is frustrating for me. I know I've seen @Brianna & Xander talk about this before, but every time we increase I can't help but do the mental math of "okay, if he had perfect numbers starting TODAY, here's how long it would take to taper down to an OTJ trial." I also find myself wondering if there's any explanation for what's happening except for that his pancreas isn't working and he needs more insulin (e.g. "Could he be sick? Or his teeth? He has no symptoms, but..." or "Could this insulin vial already be bad? I did get them at the same time and they were out of the fridge for a couple hours, but they were unopened and in a cooler, so..." etc. etc.). Just feels like we were doing so well in October and it's been getting worse, not better, since then. Making negative-progress.
Okay, vent over.

Hope everyone has a great day! We're potentially expecting snow tomorrow. When it snows we like to let Esse out the back door onto the deck to remind him that outside is bad and scary and he should be happy living inside. 😂 Here's a throwback from January as a palate cleanser from my whining. He made it to here and then waited for rescue.

View attachment 75528
OK, first off, you so have more to vent. If you're not asking something or having an emergency, vent away! And taking it out loud can sometimes help you work it through. I spent hours taking with someone last night/early morning about Nico's numbers and what to do. Besides pull my hair out.
I can't offer any knowledge on this, at I'm new and having the opposite problem. But can listen. And hopefully someone with more knowledge can chime in.
As for that second part? That had me laughing hard. It's like those memes you see if little cat paw prints leading from the door, into the snow and doing an immediate u-turn. 🤣
 
Venting is so completely reasonable, feel free. ❤️ (Also the laughing react was for poor Esse hiding under the table in the snow, not your worries!)

I didn't have Gen's BG numbers last time, so I don't know what things really looked like in the months between diagnosis and remission, but given the range of cats represented here (both in terms of their numbers/cycles and their overall time since diagnosis), it's clearly a highly varied road to follow. And it's not a bad thing to have an eye out for potential factors that might not have been caught yet. I can't remember if you've mentioned your vet since I've been around, but I hope they're good and do a thorough job on checkups in case of any sneaky issues. More than likely there aren't any and this is just how things are working for Esse, but it's helpful to have a trustworthy expert perspective. I wish everyone here had that (as it's clearly not the case).
 
Hi Lauren,
Please vent away. We all need this and it makes it easier to vent to people who are going through the same thing or similar circumstanes.
And not to make you feel like your issue is any less important but we have all been there at some point. Especially those of us who have been at this for many many years. And I know looking at Nestle's SS one wouldn't think so but we had many set backs ourselves. Even this past year there were so many times already when he was doing good and earning reductions only to have a failed reduction after failed reduction and we'd have to go back up. So many times I've also felt like we're going backwards, and "why?????", "he's been doing so well", and felt like we're loosing progress. But then we just keep at it. And we know what the end goal is. And of course I wish all our kitties can reach remission one day. But until then, we just gotta keep going. And remeber noone said it will be an easy journey. And whether we show it, or talk about it, we all struggle at some point. But believe me it is so worth it. And hopefully one day your hard work and care will pay off.
Sending virtual hugs to you and Esse and many licks from my boys
🥰🤗😽💞
 
I can't remember if you've mentioned your vet since I've been around, but I hope they're good and do a thorough job on checkups in case of any sneaky issues. More than likely there aren't any and this is just how things are working for Esse, but it's helpful to have a trustworthy expert perspective.
Yes, we like our vet and her office overall. Another doc at the practice was actually the person to refer me to FDMB! Anyway: His last check-up was in March (when he got his diagnosis) and then he had his dental/extractions in July. I would definitely consider doing an extra/early check-up if things keep going this way. If like, the vibes continue to be "off", you know?

So many times I've also felt like we're going backwards, and "why?????", "he's been doing so well", and felt like we're loosing progress. But then we just keep at it.
This is extremely reassuring, especially knowing where you are now! Thanks for your reply. ❤️
 
I feel that! Xander made rapid progress that then just kind of stopped on our current dose. I tried increasing just a smidge, but his numbers seem to be about the exact same (maybe a tiny bit higher pre shots).

I'm wondering if the change in temperature can cause their numbers to be a bit higher? Even with the heaters running and a heated blanket, I can tell he's a bit uncomfortable with the colder weather.
 
Have labs been done this year? I assume maybe when Esse had a dental done?

Wonder if that gives a clue.

You know you are welcome to vent, Lauren.

I love how you give Esse a taste of the nasty and cold outdoors as a solid reminder of the good life he now lives inside!
So smart!!

When I let Ivy out on the back patio if the wind blows or she hears a car in the street, she freaks out and runs inside asap.
She doesn't stay out for more than a few minutes. For such a wild child cat, she's a real scardey cat!

I hope you can get some answers to get him in better BG again soon! :bighug: 💖
 
I also sent the laugh for the picture and Esse outside, but I wish I could add two reactions to your message because both are so accurate 🤗

Venting can help, so vent away! You’re doing everything you can and it can feel so draining when things seem to be taking a turn. I’ve definitely felt the backwards progress and also at times not wanting to increase because it feels like failing… but I try to remind myself that increases put him in better numbers and betters numbers are at least the start to what we need for any other improvements, especially remission. Like others have said, everyone’s doses/journeys/history are different but maybe for a little hope, I think we’ve seen some cats come back from as high as 4 units. You’re right to pay attention to these things, you’re right to have these feelings, and you’re right to express all of it here! We got you and we feel you 🖤
 
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