Welcome to FDMB! The initial few weeks of learning about managing your cat's diabetes are definitely overwhelming! That's the bad news. The good news is that is become routine relatively quickly. In addition, there are typically people here 24/7 to provide assistance and support.
There are two options for more specialized treatment. There are "cat only" veterinary practices. This is the search page to find a member of the
American Assn of Feline Practitioners. I've used feline only practices in two cities and the vets were very good and knowledgable about treating feline diabetes.
The other option is to see a vet who specialized in internal medicine. From the experiences of members here, they can be hit or miss. At least how I interpret members' experiences, you run into the same problem with a general vet practice -- they treat a broad range of animals and apply the knowledge from one species to another. Needless to say, cats are not small dogs. The insulin that may be good for a dog is not great for a cat due to a cat's faster metabolism.
With respect to what to ask about, several years ago we developed this post on
screening a new vet.
It's unusual for a vet to hospitalize a cat that is diabetic and has an infection. Do you know if your cat had developed diabetic ketoacidosis (DKA)? Ketones can develop when an infection/inflammation is present, there's not enough insulin being dosed, and a cat isn't consuming enough calories. It's a dangerous condition and depending on the level of ketones, can require hospitalization. It's important for your to know if Tom developed ketones or if there are any other underlying medical conditions in addition to the diabetes.
Your instincts are spot on. Home testing is critical and is supported by the American Animal Hospital Association (AAHA) for the treatment of diabetes. When Tom is ready to come home, I'd encourage you to be informed about insulin choices. The AAHA recommends either Prozinc or Lantus (glargine) for the treatment of feline diabetes. The other insulins (e.g., Vetsulin, Novolin) are shorter acting and do not last 12 hours and they onset hard and fast. Prozinc and glargine are longer acting, gentler insulins.
Please let us know how we can help. The members here are very generous with their time and knowledge.