Getting a New Cat? One or Two?

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oreosmom

oreosmom

Member Since 2012
Hello All,

Our sugar cat died in December, and our Debbie, age 13, remains. She and Oreo were close. Debbie is slowing down and not the friendliest, but she does look lonely. She doesn't do much now.
We were considering adopting a particular mellow male cat and he would be perfect....until we found out he has a buddy at the rescue facility. They are adoptable seperately, but we feel so bad breaking them up. I wished this was disclosed at the beginning, but it was not. We would consider adopting both, but our main concern is Debbie.

Considering Debbie is 13, years old, a bit witchy, and fearful, do you guys think one cat would be better? Or do you think adopting two that are paired already would be a good combination? Or would Debbie be the third wheel?

Any advise would be welcomed!

Best,

Carol, Oreos Mom
 
Hi Carol!
IMHO, I'd adopt both of them. They'll keep each other company and Debbie can join in when she chooses. If it's just one and one that's already bonded with another cat, they may bug Debbie for that same bond. She may not want to share it...

BIG HUGS! PICTURES PLEASE!!!
 
Squeaky and KT said:
IMHO, I'd adopt both of them.
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I agree. :smile: She can join in and make friends if she wants to but the new kitty will have a friend to hang out with if Debbie isn't interested in having a new companion.
 
I think I'd also go with both, since they're bonded. There's a chance Debbie will not bond with another cat. I agree with the statement above that this will allow the two new cats to be together and Debbie wont feel as pressured to join in. My Serabi had bonded STRONGLY with my other kitty Snarf - she'd loved him since she was a kitten. When he passed, Serabi was only about 7, but she went from being a 14lb cat to barely over 7lb. I thought we were going to lose her too - for no reason other than depression. We adopted several other cats after this, but she remained solitary. She regained weight to about 9lb, but never returned to her original size. After about 6 years she FINALLY accepted one of our other cats (whom we'd had that whole 6 years) and would lick him when nobody was looking. Eventually they did start cuddling, but it took nearly 7yrs to get to that point. We finally lost her at age 17 and I can only imagine how happy she is now.

I dont mean to discourage - and obviously it TOTALLY depends on the cat - but working rescue, I've seen many cats go through either the loss of their bonded partner or the loss of an owner... and the depression is hard to deal with in many cats. My Serabi was not a very cuddly cat towards humans either (this also changed as she aged - she became rather clingy her last couple years), making it even harder for her to lose her feline companion.
 
I agree, take both. Several years ago I agreed to foster a diabetic cat & her sister. To make a long story short, they became permanent members of my household. Since they were bonded it help to make their transition into my gang of cats a lot easier.
 
Everyone loves kitties take them all home. Kidding! :lol:
Two may be a better bet if you think you and she can handle it. Not only is the one you had in mind bonded which is so sweet, it takes some of the pressure off. Two that are bonded will play together cuz they love each other, to where if you only took home the one all his play aggression may be directed towards her and it may not be welcome. Does the facility/shelter have a meet and greet area by chance? My local one does but that's not a big indication of how they'll get along if she has travel anxiety or would be freaked out by sights and smells. I think the new guy would adjust better if he had a familiar friend the main thing would just be to know that they're both friendly and obviously cat friendly. She may be in a snit over strangers for a minute but that's when you make it a point to show her she's more spoiled than ever and nothings going to change except new friends. The saying "two's company three's a crowd" definitely doesn't apply to kitties she may very well join in a ball and nap with them too.
Let us know how it goes! :-D
 
Hi Carol! Are you back to looking to adopt? :) Is is the same pair you discussed previously? I say go for it. She may like one, both or neither. But they like each other! As long as they don't gang up on her to bully her, they should be fine. Make sure to do a very, very slow introduction and give her all the love and attention that you normally would. She is the queen of the house after all! Good luck!
 
HappyCat said:
Everyone loves kitties take them all home. Kidding! :lol:
Two may be a better bet if you think you and she can handle it. Not only is the one you had in mind bonded which is so sweet, it takes some of the pressure off. Two that are bonded will play together cuz they love each other, to where if you only took home the one all his play aggression may be directed towards her and it may not be welcome. Does the facility/shelter have a meet and greet area by chance? My local one does but that's not a big indication of how they'll get along if she has travel anxiety or would be freaked out by sights and smells. I think the new guy would adjust better if he had a familiar friend the main thing would just be to know that they're both friendly and obviously cat friendly. She may be in a snit over strangers for a minute but that's when you make it a point to show her she's more spoiled than ever and nothings going to change except new friends. The saying "two's company three's a crowd" definitely doesn't apply to kitties she may very well join in a ball and nap with them too.
Let us know how it goes! :-D
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Meet & Greets Do NOT work for cats in a shelter. Cats are very territorial, so taking them to a "neutral" location would never give you a good gauge of how they would react in a normal home environment. It works very differently from dogs.
 
After I said goodbye to Maui, I gave serious thought to what to do next. Buster is 11 and not very active.

Because Buster is female and lived with 2 other females that were dominant. I decided it best to get males so as not to compete with Buster.

I also decided, thinking cat like, that I wanted younger cats (1yr or younger) but not newborn kittens, and that getting 2 was key - I wanted a bonded pair of males.

My thinking of this was that I they would have each other to play, sleep and love with and would leave Buster alone. If she chose to participate, she could, but they wouldn't bother her, the way young cats can do.

I brought two boys in (that are half brothers - one was 7 months and the other 14 months), they quickly bonded and became inseparable. I kept them in my bathroom for 2 weeks (as they were used to living in cages and the bathroom was small, yet bigger than the cages and confined enough for me to interact with them, yet do a slow introduction with Buster.

It's now 2 1/2 months later and what I hoped to happen is happening. The boys are inseparable, totally bonded and there is minimal interaction with Buster. They respect her space, her food and her items and there is no hissing, fighting or hitting. Buster recently engaged with them once - she played chase and that was it. It was enough for me to know I did the right thing, bringing in two younger boys, who would not dominate or threaten her in anyway.

Hope this helps when you make your decision.

Don't rush introductions, take it slow, start with closed doors, then put a screen, gate between them - so they can see, smell, but not touch and when the new one and your old one seem ready, just let them be
 
Reactions like that make me not want to post on this site ever again.
You don't have to get so negative about a suggestion while ignoring everything positive said. I came to be part of a community not reacted to like I'm an idiot.
Good luck with your cat. Goodbye FDMB.
 
HappyCat said:
Reactions like that make me not want to post on this site ever again.
You don't have to get so negative about a suggestion while ignoring everything positive said. I came to be part of a community not reacted to like I'm an idiot.
Good luck with your cat. Goodbye FDMB.
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I apologize if you think something I said was negative. I never meant to imply you were an idiot, that was far from my intentions. I work in a shelter environment and wanted to point out something about the shelter environment & cat behavior. I thought we were all here to support one another and learn. I'm sorry if you thought whatever I said was personal as it was not intended that way.
 
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