Hi Mimi,
Venting is certainly good, and most certainly allowed here! And you're right, who else is going to "get it"? ;-)
OK, apparently, I'm looking at a different spreadsheet than you are? Because I don't see evidence that he's not doing well, or that you are giving him "poor care".
Here's what I see.
Loki's been on Lantus for 6 weeks. He's doing better on Lantus that he was on Prozinc. His doses are lower than they were on Prozinc.
He's only been diabetic since December. I am sure that to you, that feels like two lifetimes. But it's 5 months, right? I was extremely fortunate with Bob because he was only on insulin for 10 weeks. Some cats go OTJ quickly. Some never do. But 5 months is not long, really. Not compared to some other kitties here who have been on insulin for one or more years, and still have gone OTJ. And some cats have been on insulin for many years, might be on it for many more. But the point is, they're still alive, and other than a couple shots a day, who could tell they were diabetic?
Last Saturday, you did exactly what I would have done, and I think I suggested you skip the shot? It's one shot. No big deal. Have you ever given a fur shot? A fur shot that misses completely and skipping a shot are the same thing as far as the effect. It means 24 hours without a shot in the middle. That's all. It doesn't cause you to lose any and all progress you've made to this point. You did the safe thing, and when it comes down to it, the safe thing is the right thing (in EVERY case). You couldn't be home to shoot or test, your hubby needed to work too, and there wasn't anyone you could find to shoot and test on short notice. In my opinion, you did the only thing you could do.
Don't let the pink numbers you see the past couple of days distract you from all the nice yellow and blue numbers. You skipped Saturday morning? He went up to 300, right? But then he dropped back down to 245 six hours later with no shot that morning? He didn't keep climbing. So you gave a shot Saturday night. The next morning, you saw a number that was too low for you to feel comfortable shooting! The insulin was still working. So you skipped Sunday morning due to the low number? He kept going down, to 106, after eating. And then went all the way up to an ugly red 414!!! That was a "bounce", Mimi. It wasn't because of the skipped shots. And he cleared the bounce really fast too. You gave him a shot Sunday night, and look where he was Monday morning? Back to a beautiful blue AMPS.
My guess is that he went fairly low Sunday night, and the numbers you saw yesterday were "bounce" numbers from that low. This morning he was 288, and today's cycle looks good to me. Nice and blue in the middle, and a low yellow PMPS tonight.
Listen, I'm no expert on Lantus or Lantus spreadsheets. But what I'm looking at on Loki's SS for the past few days makes sense to me. And it's a lot prettier than a lot of other Lantus spreadsheets.
You're NOT doing poorly with Loki, Mimi. Seriously. You might be frustrated, and you might be playing the "blame game", but you're doing all you can to manage this insane disease. You can't let this be a "ball and chain", and think that it rules your life. The rest of the world won't adjust to make this "easy" for you or anyone else doing this. All you can do is what is possible and practical for you. Looking in the rearview mirror has its benefits. It's helpful to be able to look back at your data at times. It can help you to try to have an idea for what the numbers might do today based on what they've done in the past. How many cycles does a cat take to clear a bounce? What does the cycle or two before a "big dive" look like for a particular cat, and do you see that pattern today? It can give you a head's up that it might be time for a low number or an active cycle. But beyond that? Don't look back. Don't let "coulda, woulda, shouda" be a distraction to you. Try to focus on today and look forward to tomorrow. Screw yesterday. It's done.
Chin up, kiddo!
Carl