One approach I tend to take...I am social with the folks who are having an easy time of it, and I thoroughly enjoy the banter with my LL peeps. But if someone is in need of help, and there is much back and forth going on between the person needing help and the helper, I stay out of the way (unless I have different yet helpful info to add), so the important info doesn't get lost or confused with too many different points of view. Once the dust settles in such a condo, then maybe I'll go in and offer the moral support.
At the same time, if there are lots of folks needing help, I also try to avoid being overly social with anyone, and I don't bump Trix's condo to the top, because I know there are others who are in need of real help and that's where the attention needs to go.
The moral support here is almost as important as the technical stuff, and it has certainly gotten me through many tough times. It is vital to keeping us all going, but we do have to remember that the kitties come first. So, once again...it's the balance thing! It is hard to figure out what that means when you're new to the group, though, so I think we also owe it to the new folks to feel comfortable with asking for advice, as well as offering moral "we've been there, we know how you feel" support. It's a great way to pay it forward, 'cause I know that I personally am more than thankful for every aspect of LL!