Cats not getting along

[Winnie's Mom]

Hello. I read and learn and cheer you all on frequently, but I'm always shy to post. I'm also at my wit's end.

Winnie is now 8 years old (today!). She and her litter mate, Maggie, used to get along so well. They slept in the same bed, groomed each other, ate together. Basically, they were inseparable.

Right along the time Winnie was diagnosed (February 2019), they started getting more distant from one another. Fast forward two years, and they no longer get along at all. They went from inseparable to us literally having to separate them sometimes to keep them from fighting. Winnie is typically the aggressor, but Maggie does hold her own.

I've looked everywhere for insight but am finding little to nothing about behavioral changes after diagnosis. Can anyone offer some hope or at least a little information? My cat mom's heart is breaking with the two of them no longer getting along. Thanks.

 

[Katherine&Ruby]

Oh dear, that would break my heart, too! My Ruby who is also diabetic and has a lot of other health issues gets real crabby with her sister when she's not well. They get along better when she is feeling better. Thankfully her sister is very passive and gives into her or walks away so it never morphs into anything major.

Have you tried a Feliway diffuser? Separating them for a period of time, say in different rooms? Last resort would be to seek the guidance of a behaviorist.

 

[Daddy Jack's Mommy (GA)]

I wish I had some great advice for you. I have one cat who has never seemed to tolerate the others, and it always made me sad. She's the youngest, at 8, and I recently noticed a shift in the dynamics. She has begun sharing blanket space and sleeping with them on the futon. I don't know what happened, other than to suspect that her age may has something to do with it. My only conscious action was to be sure that I heaped lots of love on her when I was paying attention to the other cats. I made sure she knew that she was loved too. But it seems that Winnie is the aggressor and I'm surmising that she's the one getting the lion's share of your time (being a diabetic). So I don't think she's feeling left out. Could it be that she's become more use to the lion's share of attention or time, and is hoping that it stays that way?

I think Katherine's suggestion of feliway is a great one. Other than that, try searching google for some ideas on how to help cats to get along. It may even be worth finding a good book on the subject.

I hope things can shift back to how they used to be. I understand why it's sad to see the change.

 

[Sienne and Gabby (GA)]

I have a couple of thoughts.

First, try a pheromone. I'd try putting Feliway diffusers all over your home. They can have a calming effect. When I introduced a new kitten and when I've moved, I set up Feliway and it was helpful.

Given the nature of feline diabetes, you've been giving Winnie LOTS of attention. Maybe Maggie is jealous. By necessity, you have to direct more attention to Winnie given the need to test, steer low numbers, giving treats or "special" food, etc. Try giving Maggie more attention -- individual play time, treats, etc.

Pam Johnson-Bennet is a feline behaviorist. She has a website and Facebook page. This is a link to her information on aggression.

 

[jayla-n-Drevon]

I second Sienne...I have had good luck with feliway