I hope everyone is having a wonderful Christmas Eve. Don and I celebrate Christmas Eve just us, then get together with family on Christmas Day. I was feeling pretty down today. Christmas Eve service just wasn't doable with Mikey's schedule, and with the new dose, I don't feel comfortable shooting on an 18 hour schedule like I did on Thanksgiving. So tomorrow I'll be up before 6 to shoot, and there will be a ton of extra work packing up Mikey for his jaunt to my brother's house. Although I'll be with the family, I won't be able to totally relax, because I'll be constantly running up to check Mikey. Resentment and self-pity were creeping in. Then I remembered another Christmas Eve many years ago. We spent that night at the ER vet saying goodbye to our beloved Checkers, who had lymphoma and was suffering terribly. And then there was the day after my last chemo when we had to say good bye to my soul kitty Wally who had PKD. Just over a year ago it was Duncan who died of pancreatic cancer. None of those things could really be treated. There was no hope of them coming under control or being managed ever. Mikey doesn't have lymphoma, pancreatic cancer, or PKD. He has diabetes. Diabetes is really rough. It eats up your time, your sanity, and your bank account. But despite these factors, a diabetic cat can live a long and normal life. So I'm picking myself up, brushing myself off and holding on to hope. Hope that we will be able to come off the juice in time, and if not , that he will be able to have a long, healthy, happy life, despite FD. Hope that I will be strong enough to meet his needs day by day with help from Don and all of you. I hope that in His standard way of doing things, God will make something beautiful out of this mess. I'll be looking to see what he does.
Sleep Deprived!
