11/5 Max -- He's weaker and time is short I believe

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max&emmasmommie

max&emmasmommie

Member Since 2012
Hello everyone,

Thanks to all who posted on my last condo: http://www.felinediabetes.com/FDMB/viewtopic.php?f=9&t=82482. I appreciate your kind thoughts and words of support more than you can know.

Noreen wrote about Bupe:
When I did squirt it down his throat he just gagged, he was ok with it into his cheek.
Click to expand...
That is exactly what Max does. I will try the cheek. Thanks.

Thank you Chris and Wendy for both posting the Liver Shake recipe-- My That Sounds Awful, but I'm sure it is nutritious.

He ate the liver very happily twice! I'm rethinking everything. I gave him the bupe this morning, and I let him be. I didn't try to force the Cerenia on him again, I didn't try to force the Pepcid on him, and he slept on the balcony all day in a very relaxed position. He came downstairs on his own before dark and went outside to try to poo in the leaves. I don't think he had any luck.

He went to the top of the yard where there is a little pond. When he came back down I gave him the Cerenia, the Pepcid and the Miralax mixed with heavy cream. I gave him one whole liver on a cutting board, but he didn 't want it. Then, he gobbled it all up once I held a piece of it up on my finger to his mouth. (I am wondering if his sense of smell is impaired.)

He decided he would lounge on the chaise lounge just outside the back door. Then, we had to disturb him to give him 100 cc of Fluids, and he really fought to get away for the first half of the time it took. He went up to the office after that. I brought him back down, and he ate ANOTHER whole liver! He went back to the office. I brought him back and put him on the chaise lounge where is happily sitting right now all curled up around his little shaved belly.

What a difference a day can make, huh? I don't think the Cerenia would have had time to take effect before I gave him the liver. The Pepcid is a long acting drug, and the last dose may have begun to work by the time he ate the liver. Perhaps after a day on bupe, he felt good and it was still in effect when he ate the liver. I don't know, but I am happy he ate on his own!!!!
 
Re: 11/5 Max -- Ate the Liver Well

Such exciting news, Dale!!!! Keeping you all in my thoughts and prayers. Sure is nice seeing these little positive steps! Blessings to you all and sweet Max!!!!
 
Re: 11/5 Max -- Ate the Liver Well

Yay for the liver! :-D :-D Could you get a Cerenia injection? I should warn you that the needles are huge.
Liz
 
Re: 11/5 Max -- Ate the Liver Well

LOL, I would not eat liver. ever. But I am thrilled that Max did!!!
Awesome.

Carl
 
Re: 11/5 Max -- Ate the Liver Well

Glad Max ate the liver! Was that chicken liver? Did you blend it or chop into tiny pieces? Dont give him big pieces, might cause him throw up later.
 
Re: 11/5 Max -- Ate the Liver Well

Great news! I've heard that liver shake is really amazing. It does sound disgusting.
 
Re: 11/5 Max -- Ate the Liver Well

The liver was a success! That's so great! Tomorrow you can make the liver shake. It sounds as if it is something that Max will really enjoy. So happy to hear that he has rallied.
Lots more hugs to you all,

Ella & Rusty
 
Re: 11/5 Max -- Ate the Liver Well

Morning Dale, I was so happy to see this condo with some good news on Max eating the liver and moving around and in his chaise lounge. Sending lots of good healing vines and prayers for Max and you, DH and Emma. Can't wait for another update. (((Hugs)))
 
Re: 11/5 Max -- Ate the Liver Well

Awesome!!! This condo made me want to flip_cat and dancing_cat this morning! Good news for Max and you, Dale
 
Re: 11/5 Max -- Ate the Liver Well

Om nom nom - more liver, please! Great news! Strength and healing vines to Max and his bean family :YMHUG:
 
Re: 11/5 Max -- Ate the Liver Well

Dale, I was so happy to hear that Max ate some liver on his own, not once but twice. That's awesome. It's great that he is relaxed and getting lots of rest. Tell Max PurrFace sends his best wishes to him.
 
Re: 11/5 Max -- Ate the Liver Well

This is great news!! I'm so happy max ate for you .. I'm keeping you guys in my thoughts and prayers!
 
Re: 11/5 Max -- Ate the Liver Well

Wow - that is terrific news! And such a switch from yesterday. I think you will be buying the containers of livers at the store now! Molly's sense of smell is going too, and I often have to do the same thing - get the food right at her nose, and then a little lightbulb must go on in her head, and she'll start to eat. I hope that continues to work for Max. It sounds like he's had a good day and some mellowness without the meds there for a while. Sending more vines and warm thought for you and Max. I hear the Band of Kitties is making a road trip out to visit Max today, so be prepared for a little noise and fur. I hope he has a mellow and relaxing day.
 
Re: 11/5 Max -- Ate the Liver Well

Hi Dale!

I'm so happy to hear about Max's improvement!! Hurray! I hope he continues to feel better and eat!

Hugs,
Melanie & Racci
 
Re: 11/5 Max -- Ate the Liver Well

Oh, wow, what great news! Each day is a miracle and another day to give him hugs.
I hope you have found a combination of drugs and food that help him feel better. Interesting about how he wasn't interested until you got the liver very close to his nose. You may be right about the sense of smell. I have a feral cat I feed outside and when she suddenly stopped eating I was baffled since she normally ate voraciously as you'd expect a feral to do. I captured her and took her to the vet who diagnosed that she had a bad cold. No smell = no appetite.

All my best for Max and that you continue to find ways to give him comfort and FOOD! ((((Dale & Max)))) cat_pet_icon
 
Re: 11/5 Max -- Ate the Liver Well

Soooooooooo happy to hear that Max liked bothe the shake and the chicken livers. You are doing an amazing job and I know you are so relieved that he is responding to your efforts.
 
Re: 11/5 Max -- Ate the Liver Well

Dale,

So glad Max is eating and responding better today. Your condo yesterday broke my heart but I am so glad to see a change today. You are awesome and amazing!

All my best to you and Max!
 
Re: 11/5 Max -- He's weaker and time is short, I believe

Hi. Thanks to all who have posted. I continue to be grateful for your thoughts and words of comfort in my grief.

We will see what today holds. I gave Max Bupe earlier today, and it should still be working. I brought him downstairs to have some liver just now, and I gave him the Cerenia inside a piece of liver. He ate the liver, but spit out the 1/2 pill. I forced him to take the pill, and he ate one more piece of liver. Then, he wanted to go back upstairs. So, I carried him and put him back on the balcony. I'm going to take him his water fountain soon. He wants to stay on the balcony. He stands at the sliding glass door if it's closed. So, I'll plug the fountain in up there.

He slept with us last night, and I had a horrible DREAM this morning that he was lying on the bed, and I was petting him. He started to throw up blood. I was crying and trying to call the vet to get him in for an emergency visit to be put to sleep. It was absolutely horrible. It has made me realize that I can't really let him go too early, only too late. If I had to get him in the car while he was hurting and take him to the vet's office instead of having someone come here to his home and gently let him go I couldn't stand it.

I was thinking it should be tomorrow, but then I walked out on the balcony and he lifted his head, and looked up at me, and I just don't know all over again. The woman I contacted about a home visit doesn't work on Wednesday. Perhaps someone else does, but even so, he's not enjoying this life, and it can only get worse. At the same time I don't want to let go any sooner than I have to.

I can hardly stand to think of letting Max leave me or us. I cannot bear to think about it without crying very hard. My husband is very torn up, and it's incredibly difficult for him to see Max this way. This is bringing back memories of his father's death last year. The weight loss . . . just the whole way it's happening. Even when I can see that Max is just relaxing on the bupe and doesn't show any signs of pain or discomfort, he does look awful. He's skinny, and he's dirty. He lies there with his bones showing through and that tumor gets more pronounced all the time.

I can't let Emma touch Max because she is sometimes rough. Even if she is gentle, Max is apprehensive when she's near him. I've been teaching her to be gentle with all her animals, both stuffed and live, so that she doesn't have to try to understand why Max is different. She is rarely rough now. However, what is important is that Max is apprehensive, and that's not fair to him.

I have been cutting one liver up at a time. He would not eat an entire liver last night. He left a piece. He ate only one piece this morning, and then this afternoon he ate those two pieces, as mentioned. He has herpes in one of his eyes, and it must be acting up. (Not transmissible to humans -- different strain.) That's most likely why his eye has discharge. I'm sure the bupe helps with the pain when he blinks or whatever cats do - squint? However, it's like having a cold, and I'm sure it is interfering with his sense of smell. Something about CRF can do that, too.

He's very weak, but he still walks, and he just used the litter box to pee. I don't know about poo. None in the LB. He probably needs another fluid treatment, but my husband isn't home today. He's had three doses of Miralax since yesterday morning. I'll give him another tonight.

I'd like to get a dose of Pepcid down him right now, and yet I hate to do it.

My poor baby. I can't think of anything to make him feel good. He doesn't want to be petted, not much, anyway. If he does respond to it, he will not purr no matter how hard we try. Maybe I should put a heating pad under a towel and make it an option for him up there. I have a feeling he's on the balcony because it's warm up there. I'm going to go spend some time with him while Emma naps.

Take care, All
 
Re: 11/5 Max -- Ate the Liver Well

oh Dale, just read you're very sad last post and the tears are running down my cheeks.
What a cruel choice for you to make.

It seems you're very close to that terrible decision and you will make it in Max's best interest - even if its not what you want. That's true love.

Best wishes,

Denise
 
Re: 11/5 Max -- Ate the Liver Well

(((Dale))) it sounds like Max rallied yesterday and it looked hopeful, but today is different. Do you have any of the pill pockets to hide the pills since Max is so smart in finding them in the liver. The heating pad and towel sounds like a good idea. He may be getting cold as it sounds like he keeps losing weight. Were you still thinking of the Quality of Life Assessment? My heart breaks for you as I know how much you love him. I know, too, whatever decision and when you make it will be in Max's best interest. Vines and prayers for Max, and for you and DH in making this decision.
Hugs for little Emma.
 
Re: 11/5 Max -- Ate the Liver Well

Oh Dale I am so sorry to hear this. We were all so pleased when Max seemed to be rallying but today he sounds miserable. Spend as much time as you can with him now, enjoy what time you have left. Will your DH be home for you tomorrow?
 
Re: 11/5 Max -- Ate the Liver Well

Thank you, Ann and Denise, for posting and for your concern.

I think I'm coming to terms with this. I looked at the quality of life link given to me in the last condo, and DH and I talked about it. To take Max in for that would require a trip to the vet, and I really hate to do that to him. He doesn't want to be picked up or held. He was never that sort of cat except on his terms, but making him take a car ride doesn't feel right to me.

The vet who would come to our home for QofL charges over three times as much as the our vet would. Of course, the vet knows Max and us, and wouldn't be traveling, etc. I feel confident now that I can make this decision without that consultation and still feel "good" about it.

Yesterday, I thought I needed someone to help me decide, but seeing the pain in my husband's eyes at watching Max go downhill, and seeing that today Max's condition is worse than yesterday . . . even if Max seems better this evening as he has the past two nights what will tomorrow bring? I have to schedule this vet to come to the house for the final goodbye somewhat in advance. I think it is best for all of us if I can accept that it is time. I can cry my heart out later. I'm not going to be able to watch him be this way for too much longer myself.

Someone said to me in a previous condo that the only regrets she had were for the times she waited too long.
 
Now, I'm told that cats do seem to do better in the evenings when they are sick like this, and then one day they don't show improvement in the evening.

I gave a liver. He ate all but two pieces, and he drank some water. Then, I gave him the Pepcid 1/4 pill and the Miralax dissolved in water -- with an oral syringe. He fought me on both. It should be time for more bupe, soon. I put him on the chaise lounge, and he's sitting there with his head up and looking around.
 
Re: 11/5 Max -- Ate the Liver Well

Oh (((Dale)))),
I'm sorry. It is a hard decision and it sounds like you are just about there - being able to make that decision.
I think reading all this with you is helping me as well with my ds's cat, Phaedra. I don't have the option of someone coming to the house.
An hour or two a day of good moments doesn't outweigh the other 22 hrs if he's declining that fast.
I hope you can find peace with the decision. It is a gift of love even though it's so hard to do that he doesn't have to suffer a long time. cat_pet_icon
 
(((Dale)))

My heart is breaking for all of you. It sounds like you have come to terms with this, and as always, you are putting Max first.

You mentioned using a towel and heating pad. Great idea, we did that a lot with wild animals, especially young orphans. Just use a large towel that you can put half on and half off the heating pad in case he gets too warm but still wants the security and comfort of the towel.

Someone said to me in a previous condo that the only regrets she had were for the times she waited too long.
Click to expand...
I'm not sure who that was, but I can relate to it. I've lost many kitties over the 30+ years they've been a part of my life. I can recall two times in particular that I waited too long, and it was really difficult to get past the guilt and regret from that decision. Other times, I didn't get to make a decision, and the kitty made it for me. It is never easy, always a heart-breaking and gut wrenching decision. I hate playing "god" and feeling no matter which choice I make, I'll always 2nd guess myself. It's the hardest part of pet ownership and when we allow these beautiful animals into our lives and come to love them like our children, we assume an awesome responsibility for ultimately their very lives are in our hands.

Please know that I am with you and DH in spirit as you deal with this.
My thoughts and prayers to all of you,
Carl
 
Dear Dale,
Every cat is different and every bean is, too. You will follow your heart. Max will know and you will know. When the hour arrives to release him from his pain, you will be giving him the ultimate gift of love. You will be there to hold him in your arms and to comfort him. Wherever you are, that is home to Max.

Many, many hugs to you, your DH, Emma, and your brave Max,

Ella & Rusty
 
Thank you very much, Rhiannon, Pat, Carl, Anne and Liz, and Ella. I am very lucky that I have the opportunity to help him with this. Too many times we don't get that chance. I'm having to watch out that he doesn't disappear on me though. I keep walking out there and scratching his ears, which he is responding to, but I'm doing it half because I can't stay away from him and half because I'm afraid he'll sneak off where I can't find him and you know . . .
 
(((Dale, DH and Max)))

I think Carl did a great job of saying how I feel too. The playing god feeling makes me feel so guilty that I could have given a kitty a few more days, a few more naps in the sun. But I have to step outside myself and wonder how good the sun feels, and how good those days are. We kept a dog with us way too long. My DH couldn't let go, and now he regrets what he put Kelly through, but looking back at it, we had no idea *when* would have been the right time. It turns out the *right* time for him, for me, and for the dog were three different times. I think as long as *you* can come to terms with it before Max does, then you spare him the hardest days.

My heart goes out to you, and I'm thinking about you guys a lot lately. It's the hardest part about adopting a kitty and saving a life.

Lisa
 
Thank you, Lisa, so very much.

We are planning to take his ashes to Del Mar where he loved to be, and put them in the soil right in front of the place he would always rub himself all over when we let him out of the car for a visit. We can visit "him" there any time we like, but yes, I know in my heart that he will be with me, with us, in spirit. It's just going to be very, very hard to be unable to touch him and hold him.
 
Dale,
You are the total love that Max needs.
I know that because of your deep and unending love for each other, you and Max will always be together. When your heart finally heals, there will be a little bump there. That bump will be Max, always in your heart and anytime you want to touch him, just pet that little bump in your heart. He will know.

Take care We send you all our love.
mary and oliver
 
Blessings and hugs and hugs and blessings and prayers and love and scritches for Max and prayers and love and more scritches for Max. I hate that you are having to go through this roller coaster and make these decisions. Many blessings to you, your family and Max.
 
Dale,
I can't add any more eloquent words than everyone has already shared. Just know that our hearts are with you as you face this. Big huge hugs and prayers for comfort for you and all of US left grieving. He carries a part of our hearts too....
 
Dale I'm so sorry that Max isn't doing well today. It seems that you will be making that very difficult decision soon. I don't know if we can ever know the "exact" time that is best for us to let them go. I also don't believe that after you make the decision that you will be wondering if it was the right one at the right time. I can tell from your post that you and Max have a very special bond and you will know when it's time and that time WILL BE the right time for both you and Max. Max has given you so many wonderful, and I'm sure at times funny, memories over the years so as the weeks and months pass and you find yourself feeling sad over your loss go on your balcony or sit on the chaise lounge that Max loved and reach inside of yourself and take out one of those happy memories the Max left you and enjoy it with him again. We have Max and you and your family in our prayers I wish there was some way we could ease you pain. God Bless.
 
Dale

Its so hard to know what to say at such a difficult time. We had a kitty, our sweet Nik, who had liver cancer and we waited too long. He was the sweetest cat ever and when he started hiding and growling at us, we knew we had waited too long. The vet told us that the greatest gift of love we can give our kitties is to help them cross when they are in pain and suffering and it is clear it cannot improve. You have given Max great, great love and your last true proof of your love will be when you help him transition to a life free of pain where he will be whole again.

Sending you prayers for strength.
 
Marje, thank you, and I'm sorry to hear you had that experience. I'm sure you did the best you could under the circumstances. It's very hard to know, and it can happen quickly, I know, or it can be very long and hard to know when is the right time.
 
Hugs to you Dale. My heart cries with you as you and Max have to go through this process. What a blessing that your vet will come to your home. Max will get to say good-bye in his home and that is just so special. I won't even describe the horrible vet experience we had when we had to say good-bye to Baxter last year, and to know your experience can be more humane and compassionate is so nice. Max loves you and I pray you will come to that place of peace in this decision.

Karen
 
Dale:

I've missed a lot of what has been happening due to my mom being in the hospital, but I just got caught up.

(((HUGS))) just aren't enough. I wish I could say that I feel your pain, since I've lost two cats due to quick-growing, cancerous tumors, where one minute the cat is fine, and one week later, due to their suffering, the only humane decision I could make was to let them go.

But, the difference is that those cats weren't diabetic, and I hadn't just devoted months and months to get them into remission, like you did with Max, because of how much you love him. I know that, if there was anything you could physically do right now to to reverse his condition, you would do it, no matter what sacrifices you had to make. Because of your love for the little guy.

When to let them go is never an easy decision. And once we make the decision, we frequently wonder if we did it too soon, or if we did it too late. None of us (on these boards, anyway) want our pets to suffer. Yet, because we love them, we don't want them gone from our lives. And cats are so stoic....not wanting you to know how much they are suffering. That makes the "final" decision so much harder.

My heart and prayers are with you and your hubby during this stressful and sad time. Max knows how much he is loved, and is trusting you both to make the right decision in a timely manner. The fact that you want him to be in his loving home, with his loving family, when his time comes, just demonstrates to me how much you love that guy!

Max could not have found a better family than yours, to pamper him, and care for him, and love him. Don't ever forget that.

(((HUGS))) again,

Suze
 
My heart is breaking for you.
Max will always know how much you love him.
You've always done what was best for him just like you are still doing.
My thoughts and prayers are with you.
 
((Dale and Max)) I'm thinking of you a lot these days. Going through FD with him you've come to know him even better than you did before. It hurts us to see what is happening to dear sweet Max. I hope you can get a vet to come to your house. I just went through this with a friend and her dog on Friday with a traveling vet who is new to our area. It made the whole experience seem a lot more peaceful and comforting.
 
Sending Hugs and peaceful thoughts. Max knows he is loved and you will never forget him.
 
Dale,

Your plan for Max's ashes sounds so very peaceful and *right* for all of you. I suspect 100% that Max would agree with you. I think that will give you some peace to know where his ashes are, and that when you visit him, you will know he's jumping out of the car all over at that special place he loves to be with you. It sounds like you are working though this in a very positive way and that feels so good to hear from you. You're planning that special place for Max in your heart. My Josie was the world to me - a very smart pussy cat who'd put her paws on my shoulder *just so* when I carried her around, and she rubbed her cheeks against mine. I held her like that when we let her go. The vet took ink paw prints. Her paw pads were different colors. I had her exact paw prints, colors and all, tattooed on my shoulder right where she used to put them. When I see them every morning, she is with me, where she's supposed to be. I don't know what prompted me to do that. It sounds like your thoughts for Max's ashes also have that "it's supposed to be" feeling to them too.

Lots of love and comfort to you, DH, and also to wonderful special Max,

Lisa
 
Dale, I just wanted to let you know I'm still praying for you as you make this tough decision. It is never easy to let one of our furbabies go, but sometimes we have to. He knows you love him and he won't be in pain any more.
 
I'm so sorry Dale. Sending peaceful painfree vines for Max and strength and comfort to you and your family. Letting go is the hardest thing.
 
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