GA 8/10 Maus AMP/171 Tough choices Update

Susan for Maus (GA)

Member Since 2022
Good morning all, today is not a good one for me. My mom (93, opposite coast) is in the hospital and I'll probably need to go. There is no one here who can care for Maus beyond testing and insulin and I'm afraid I need to put her down. If it were just the diabetes, I'd bring her with, but the hard truth is, she isn't thriving and I'm struggling to keep her comfortable as it is. She's such a fighter, I hate to not give her every last chance but I'm also a firm believer that animals should not suffer. I'd gladly rehome her, but I don't know anyone who could take her on.

I'm a mess, totally torn up about Maus & I really need to be thinking of my mom.

Thoughts welcome, I really need some support right now
 
I’ve been in your shoes but my mom was just about a mile away. I am so sorry you are in such a difficult situation. I hope it’s something your mom can recover from. I lost Max and then my mom a month later. It pains me to read this. When will you need to leave? Any idea how long will you be away?
Whatever way you go please do not have any guilt or regrets. You are doing your best for both. Nobody but you can make this difficult decision. My heart goes out to you and prayers your way as you decide.
 
I’ve been in your shoes but my mom was just about a mile away. I am so sorry you are in such a difficult situation. I hope it’s something your mom can recover from. I lost Max and then my mom a month later. It pains me to read this. When will you need to leave? Any idea how long will you be away?
Whatever way you go please do not have any guilt or regrets. You are doing your best for both. Nobody but you can make this difficult decision. My heart goes out to you and prayers your way as you decide.
Thank you for your thoughts. My mom has an obstructed bowl and to make matters worse, fell in the doc office & now has stitches. She's pretty tough for 93, but at that age, even little things can take one down. My eldest brother is nearby, but not the person I'd want to count on for comfort & care. I imagine I'll be gone a week or more.

The hard reality is, I'd already been pondering Maus's health and the sad reality that without (or even with) some major interventions, she's not getting better & I struggle daily to keep her on the level. I was thinking of an ultrasound, but that's off the table now. She's chosen to live in our treehouse (it's quite nice) I think because it's quiet & an escape from the everyday bustle of family. I work from there and DH & I relax with her there in the evenings. She mostly sleeps & I need to carry her out to the garden with me now.

I really just wanted to give her more time, I don't think she's ready to go, I'm not ready to let her go, but this could be a blessing in disguise.
 
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oh Susan my heart breaks for you and Maus, I had such hope for her to get regulated, you made such amazing progress from not being able to fathom BG tests, to where you are now.

She doesn't sound like she's quite at the point yet where she is suffering, but the hard part is how do you know when is the right time where she doesn't.

I have not had to make a decision like this myself. I dread the day. Know that whatever you do we are here for you and support you and Maus. My mom is 82, pacemaker, COPD, and more so I know how tough it is with an elderly parent but mine is just 25 minutes away.

:bighug: :bighug: :bighug:
 
You are one of the most valuable supports I have found in this journey with FD:bighug:.
KNOW THAT I SUPPORT YOU! You are faced with an unfair decision.
You HAVE my ears, shoulders, hands, heart, love, support and any and every thing you need/want. If that includes a punching bag, I'm it.
 
Susan, I am so sorry to know you are facing this decision. It is the hardest thing that a cat parent will face.

Like probably many people here, I have had to say goodbye to multiple cats over the years. The only thing that has troubled me afterward is the question of whether I might have waited a little too long when they were ready to go, because of the pain of letting them go.

You are strong and intelligent. You will know what is right for Maus, and when. She is so lucky to have such a caring and determined mom to love her as you do. I support you regardless of what you feel is best to do.
 
I have no thoughts or advice to offer. It is a really hard decision and I have no experience with it. Just wanted to send you :bighug::bighug::bighug:
 
My heart breaks reading this. Life can be so tough! I am not looking forward to the day when I have to make a decision like this for my George. Such a delicate balance of living vs comfort. Having senior parents and cats to take care of is a lot. If I lived down the road, I’d help you in a heartbeat! Sending you lots of fur hugs. :bighug:
 
OMG, you people are beautiful. Thank you everyone, I'm so fortunate to have this group.
I have had to say goodbye to multiple cats over the years. The only thing that has troubled me afterward is the question of whether I might have waited a little too long when they were ready to go, because of the pain of letting them go.
This is a good reminder. After wandering around in the garden and orchard for just a bit, she found a dense thicket to crawl under. This has been her way all summer and my indication that even with cerenia, she's not feeling well & I'm just prolonging.

Thank you everyone for your support, I'll post a recap later
 
oh Susan my heart breaks for you and Maus, I had such hope for her to get regulated, you made such amazing progress from not being able to fathom BG tests, to where you are now.

She doesn't sound like she's quite at the point yet where she is suffering, but the hard part is how do you know when is the right time where she doesn't.

I have not had to make a decision like this myself. I dread the day. Know that whatever you do we are here for you and support you and Maus. My mom is 82, pacemaker, COPD, and more so I know how tough it is with an elderly parent but mine is just 25 minutes away.

:bighug: :bighug: :bighug:
you were so inspiring. Dammit, I really, really wanted for Mause to go OTJ.
 
You are one of the most valuable supports I have found in this journey with FD:bighug:.
KNOW THAT I SUPPORT YOU! You are faced with an unfair decision.
You HAVE my ears, shoulders, hands, heart, love, support and any and every thing you need/want. If that includes a punching bag, I'm it.
Unfair, yep. I'll stick around just to send you silly gifs :p
 
You know whatever you decide, you will have our support. I was getting the vibes in your earlier posts that Maus didn't feel very well, my heart goes out to you. I am sending the strongest healing vibes for you mom. At age 88 my mother needed surgery for just that situation. Praying for you.
 
It's been a day. Thank you all for your kind wishes. I spoke to a couple different vets today and had a really long talk with the vet when I took her in this afternoon. She hadn't seen Maus in a few years and was totally skeptical and not at all okay with why I was there. We talked for close to an hour, went over all the labs, efforts, possible options, Maus's personality, and ultimately fell on the side of let's stop while she's feeling not completely terrible all the time because it's likely just going to get worse. I've had close to 15 cats & never had such a hard call to make. I talked to everyone I could think of in hope someone would tell me I wasn't doing the right thing. In the meantime, my mom's in a hospital and really needs me.

Took her out to the garden before we headed out. She looks so bright in the pic, but the reality is, that's a rare glimpse of her former self. She was such a sweet girl and I'll forever miss her hanging out with me in the greenhouse and garden.

Thank you all for your love and support. I've told so many people (and all the vets) about this resource - perhaps part of Maus's legacy will be awareness and who knows, some kitty might come here and go into the remission we had all hoped for Maus.

Be well everyone, Hugs to all & face rubs to all your special sugar kitties :bighug::bighug::bighug:
:rb_icon:cat_wings>o

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It's been a day. Thank you all for your kind wishes. I spoke to a couple different vets today and had a really long talk with the vet when I took her in this afternoon. She hadn't seen Maus in a few years and was totally skeptical and not at all okay with why I was there. We talked for close to an hour, went over all the labs, efforts, possible options, Maus's personality, and ultimately fell on the side of let's stop while she's feeling not completely terrible all the time because it's likely just going to get worse. I've had close to 15 cats & never had such a hard call to make. I talked to everyone I could think of in hope someone would tell me I wasn't doing the right thing. In the meantime, my mom's in a hospital and really needs me.

Took her out to the garden before we headed out. She looks so bright in the pic, but the reality is, that's a rare glimpse of her former self. She was such a sweet girl and I'll forever miss her hanging out with me in the greenhouse and garden.

Thank you all for your love and support. I've told so many people (and all the vets) about this resource - perhaps part of Maus's legacy will be awareness and who knows, some kitty might come here and go into the remission we had all hoped for Maus.

Be well everyone, Hugs to all & face rubs to all your special sugar kitties :bighug::bighug::bighug:
:rb_icon:cat_wings>o

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I'm so very sorry for your loss. It is a great loss indeed. I'm going to miss you Ms Maus! I pray you are surrounded by fields of endless catmint. ❤️ ❤️
 
As painful as it is I do think you made the right decision at the right time. Maus was well loved and will always be with you in spirit. I hope your mom handles the surgery well. My mom had that surgery and despite her CHF did well. :bighug:
 
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@#$%, I held it together until I saw the GA in your username Susan. What a beautiful girl she was and you gave it your best shot at getting her well. She surely would have only suffered more and more as the days wore on and without you around while you travel to see your mom, who knows what would have become of her or how badly she would have felt as she got sicker.

I wish I could have done more to help somehow. I'm sorry.
 
I'm so very sorry. The pain of losing a beloved cat is so terrible. You gave Maus the gift of mercy and did the right thing for her even though it is so painful for you. What a selfless thing to do for someone you love. My condolences to you; you will be on my mind and I will send you healing thoughts. :bighug::bighug::bighug::bighug:
 
The Rainbow Bridge

RainbowBridge.jpg


Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....


Anonymous
(Source: https://www.cats.org.uk/glasgow/feature-pages/rainbow-bridge)
 
Annnd now I'm crying again (like I ever stopped) :arghh:

@Ben&Squirrel that's beautiful, thank you

:bighug::bighug::bighug:

Hard as we try, we can't fix all of them. Thanks to this group, she did not suffer from diabetes, it was the other thing that caused the diabetes that did her in. She was too sweet for pain, and she was in pain. Being with her all day yesterday really brought that message home to me

Packing for MD now, time to take care of my mom
 
Hi Susan,
I see you have some wonderful support on this thread. I am new here, but I wanted to tell you I looked at the photo of Maus for a minute with tears in my eyes thinking what a beautiful girl. Sending so much love your way, thanks for what you do on this page. Us newbies need people like you. xoxo
 
Hi Susan,
I see you have some wonderful support on this thread. I am new here, but I wanted to tell you I looked at the photo of Maus for a minute with tears in my eyes thinking what a beautiful girl. Sending so much love your way, thanks for what you do on this page. Us newbies need people like you. xoxo
You've come to the right spot, welcome :bighug:
 
Susan - I am so sorry you were put in such a tough position. :bighug::bighug: I just got back in town, to such sad news that Maus has now earned her angel wings. I'm glad she had a good last day. Cherish that memory.:rb_icon:

I hope all goes well with your mom, she will be so lucky and glad to have you there.
 
Hi everyone, thanks again for all the support and well wishes. My mom came home yesterday afternoon, no surgery required to clear the bowel obstruction; very good news & will make for a speedy recovery. She fell at the Prompt Care last week, broke her finger & cut her lip so the stitches, splint and bruising make for quite a sight not at all related to the hospital stay o_O. I get to hound her even more now about exercise :p. Her apt was quite the mess though, very out of character, so I'll need to assess what else is needed for her well being & could be here for a bit.

I'll never get over how I had to leave it with Maus (still cry - a lot), but must figure out how to be okay with the best decision was made considering the circumstances. I suppose that's what happens when difficult animals are dependent on a single human for care. Deep down, I know the chance of her full recovery was slim, we just weren't done fighting. What a loss; such a dear sweet little girl.

On the up side, there's a very overweight cat where I was staying while my mom was in hospital & I was able to have a great discussion with the owner about obesity, diabetes & the importance of a good diet, especially for weight loss. Because of my diabetes experience with Mause (and the ton of homework I had to do), the owner was very receptive & I've sent her info links including the carb calculator & the Pierson food list.

I've also (prematurely) googled diabetic cat rescue. This is the first time in my life I've been kitty-free & have a feeling it won't last long. Next one will for sure have to pass the snuggle test though, I still have scars to remember Maus by ;)

Peace & love to all :bighug:
 
Hi everyone, thanks again for all the support and well wishes. My mom came home yesterday afternoon, no surgery required to clear the bowel obstruction; very good news & will make for a speedy recovery. She fell at the Prompt Care last week, broke her finger & cut her lip so the stitches, splint and bruising make for quite a sight not at all related to the hospital stay o_O. I get to hound her even more now about exercise :p. Her apt was quite the mess though, very out of character, so I'll need to assess what else is needed for her well being & could be here for a bit.

I'll never get over how I had to leave it with Maus (still cry - a lot), but must figure out how to be okay with the best decision was made considering the circumstances. I suppose that's what happens when difficult animals are dependent on a single human for care. Deep down, I know the chance of her full recovery was slim, we just weren't done fighting. What a loss; such a dear sweet little girl.

On the up side, there's a very overweight cat where I was staying while my mom was in hospital & I was able to have a great discussion with the owner about obesity, diabetes & the importance of a good diet, especially for weight loss. Because of my diabetes experience with Mause (and the ton of homework I had to do), the owner was very receptive & I've sent her info links including the carb calculator & the Pierson food list.

I've also (prematurely) googled diabetic cat rescue. This is the first time in my life I've been kitty-free & have a feeling it won't last long. Next one will for sure have to pass the snuggle test though, I still have scars to remember Maus by ;)

Peace & love to all :bighug:
I’m happy to hear that your mom is going to recover and not need surgery. What a relief. Tell me, how did you come by Maus? How did she become your cat?
 
I’m happy to hear that your mom is going to recover and not need surgery. What a relief. Tell me, how did you come by Maus? How did she become your cat?
My daughter went to a slumber party and KITTENS! She was a natural hunter & my kids were into Greek mythology so Artemis was quickly decided upon. We happened to be in a Die Fledermaus (opera) phase and Artemis was clipped to Maus.
 
My daughter went to a slumber party and KITTENS! She was a natural hunter & my kids were into Greek mythology so Artemis was quickly decided upon. We happened to be in a Die Fledermaus (opera) phase and Artemis was clipped to Maus.

from what you describe she had an amazing 13 years in the PNW living a life most cats can only dream of, frolicking in the redwoods and ferns and pooping wherever she pleased. If you ever get a chance to upload any videos of her to YT please share. For some reason I really connected with your story and with her despite 3000 miles and never actually knowing her.
 
My daughter went to a slumber party and KITTENS! She was a natural hunter & my kids were into Greek mythology so Artemis was quickly decided upon. We happened to be in a Die Fledermaus (opera) phase and Artemis was clipped to Maus.
Yes. I think I remember you telling me about the Artemis and Die Fledermaus. I'm familiar with that Strauss opera. Thanks to you mentioning this, I just watched the Overture performed by the Vienna Philharmonic. Really good. So I guess she could have been Diana instead of Artemis :-) was she really a good hunter, too? Your property looks like it's gorgeous. She did have a great life it sounds like to me. So she was hard to handle (you mentioned the scratches.)
 
I’m so sorry for your loss and the difficult circumstances. Even when our logic reassures us we did what we had to do, our hearts are sometimes slower to agree. As someone who also has a cat whom only I can manage, I really do understand. Please be kind to yourself. :bighug:

And cherish those scars!
My beloved, 30ish year old rescue horse accidentally whacked me in the head and chipped one of my bottom teeth. We’d been together forever and I knew time was growing short, so I actually declined when the dentist offered to smooth over the chip. My horse has been gone a few years, but now every time my tongue hits that rough spot on my tooth, I think of him and smile.
 
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