GA Dear Shelley, now at rest.

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MrWorfMen's Mom said:
I gave Metacam to my GA heart kitty for several years for arthritis without any problems
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I also give Metacam to my old tortie on a daily basis now. (In her case it enables her to eat.)
And here in the UK we have Metacam in a strength especially for cats, so it's much easier to give an appropriate dose.

Anthony, we are all thinking of you and Shelley. You're doing a wonderful job of caring for her.
I don't know if you're a 'hug' person. But just in case you are here is one for you...
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Anthony, so sorry to hear about Shelley's diagnosis :bighug::bighug::bighug:. I'm sure you are making her as comfortable as possible and knows how much you love her :bighug:.
 
Thank you Mary Ann, Eliz, Diana and Yong and everyone who has been so kind and generous with their time and expertise. You are all wonderful people and I could never have imagined I would receive such kindness and support here.
I am very sorry post the news that my dear Shelley was put to sleep on Monday 31st July.

I gave Shelley the Metacam on Sunday lunchtime after which she slept solidly for 10 hours. When she woke I had hoped to test her BG but when I picked her up she became very distressed, struggling and whining and was obviously in a lot of pain. I always tried to be gentle with her but somehow I had hurt her.

After this she tried to rest but took a lot of time trying to get comfortable, turning one way and then the other. Eventually she laid down but I could tell she was in pain. Her breathing was fast and she purred continually but didn’t go to sleep.

As she did not seem to be improving I decided to take her to the emergency vet service which is operated by Vets Now. I saw a very sympathetic vet who examined Shelley and told me that the liver tumour was now the size of a navel orange. She gave Shelley a buprenorphine injection and a sedative. She told me that the kindest thing would be to put Shelley to sleep before the tumour started to hemorrhage. It was agreed I would take Shelley home and see my own vet the next day.

On arriving home I was shocked to see the effect the injection had on poor Shelley. She could hardly walk and seemed to be struggling to breath. I rang Vets Now and was told this was a normal reaction and that she would soon settle down.

It did take a while but Shelley did eventually settle more. By this time it was the early hours of Monday and just a matter of hours to wait until my vets opened.

Once I was able to contact them they couldn't give me an appointment until 11.00 am. But this turned out to be a good thing because Shelley brightened up in those last couple of hours. She had a few small amounts of food and sat looking out of the front door into the garden with the sun on her.

It was very hard to take her away from this period of calm and normality to what was in store for her.

When the vet at my usual practice examined Shelley she described the tumour as being as large as a grapefruit and also agreed that it was best to let Shelley go. The vet and the nurse were incredibly kind and sensitive and Shelley was very calm and quiet and passed away peacefully.

It is shocking that less than a week previous the vet wasn’t even sure it was a tumour but in a few days it has grown so large. And she only saw the vet that previous Tuesday as he suggested I take her in after we had discussed her BG numbers. It is hard to understand how I could not see she was so ill.

I really did not want to do this but having seen her so uncomfortable, in moments of extreme pain, the risk of a hemorrhage and the distress the buprenorphine caused, it was the decision I made.

Whether she could have stayed longer and had a little more quality of life, I will never know.

She was a real sweetheart who was always so good and compliant, no matter what was asked of her. Although I have my other cats here there is such an emptiness without her because she was the one that needed me the most and I will miss her and all that we shared very much.
 
Tears are running down my face as I read your last post Anthony. I can so relate to your final day with Shelley. Letting her go was the kindest and most loving thing you could do for your beloved girl. Often towards the end a kitty will have a bit of a "rally" where they seem to be much improved (Tuxie also did this), but then they will decline rapidly afterwards. Please, please do not blame yourself your not knowing about the cancer. The vets were not even sure if it was cancer so there was no way for you to know.

You gave Shelley care and love and at the end the most precious...and hardest...gift of love. You allowed her to escape the pain and rapidly declining QOL with dignity. Shelley is free of pain and suffering now. I know how big a hole our beloved sugar babies can leave in our hearts, but hold close all the special memories to give you comfort and strength.

My thoughts and prayers are with your at this sad sad time Anthony :bighug::bighug::bighug:

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Tuxedo Mom said:
Tears are running down my face as I read your last post Anthony. I can so relate to your final day with Shelley. Letting her go was the kindes and most loving thing you could do for your beloved girl. Often towards the end a kitty will have a bit of a "rally" where they seem to be much improved (Tuxie also did this), but then they will decline rapidly afterwards. Please, please do not blame yourself your not knowing about the cancer. The vets were not even sure if it was cancer so there was no way for you to know.

You gave Shelley care and love and at the end the most precious...and hardest...gift of love. You allowed her to escape the pain and rapidly declining QOL with dignity. Shelley is free of pain and suffering now. I know how big a hole our beloved sugar babies can leave in our hearts, but hold close all the special memories to give you comfort and strength.

My thoughts and prayers are with your at this sad sad time Anthony :bighug::bighug::bighug:

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Thank you Mary Ann, your kind words and thoughts are a comfort.
I am sorry if the the news has upset you but I realise the pain is never far away for people who have gone through this, especially so recently as you have.
I can't say thank you enough for all your kindness and support over the last six months. You and the other wonderful people have always there for me, just when I needed you.
 
Anthony.... my tears are for you and your loss, for my own recent loss and for everyone who has lost a beloved kitty. We all know how hard and devastating it is to lose a beloved furbaby and we all feel your pain. Please do continue to post for whatever support we can offer. We all understand and feel your pain.

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I'm so sorry for your loss. I understand the pain you are going through. I too lost my cat not too long ago. :bighug::bighug::bighug:
 
Tuxedo Mom said:
Anthony.... my tears are for you and your loss, for my own recent loss and for everyone who has lost a beloved kitty. We all know how hard and devastating it is to lose a beloved furbaby and we all feel your pain. Please do continue to post for whatever support we can offer. We all understand and feel your pain.

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Thank you Mary Ann, very much appreciated.
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Oh, Anthony, I'm so sorry to read about your poor kitty. Please don't second guess yourself because you've been an extremely caring and conscientious cat parent. You did everything you could for your sweet girl right to the end. She's no longer in any pain. :bighug::bighug:
 
Kris & Teasel said:
Oh, Anthony, I'm so sorry to read about your poor kitty. Please don't second guess yourself because you've been an extremely caring and conscientious cat parent. You did everything you could for your sweet girl right to the end. She's no longer in any pain. :bighug::bighug:
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Thank you Kris, that's very good of you. Shelley did get a lot of attention after her hypo but it never occurred to me things would turn out like this so soon. I think most people look back and wonder if they could have done more but this seems to have been so aggressive that it would have been hopeless in any event.
 
Anthony, I am so very sorry to hear Shelley has earned her wings. Myheart aches for you. It's so hard to say goodbye to these furry souls who become such an integral part of our lives. They are never with us long enough. You had no way of knowing what was going on with Shelley and making that final decision to let her go with dignity is the most difficult yet most loving gift of all. :bighug::bighug::bighug::bighug:

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RIP sweet Shelley cat_wings>o
 
I'm just so very very sorry and sad to see this, Anthony. You and Shelley fought so hard and so bravely. Life being what it is, we can never predict how things will turn out and it is so often a shock when we face a sudden situation like this.

Each and every one of us here feels your pain. The loss of a special bond like you had with Shelley is hard to bear and it will take time to fully accept. There are few words at times like this that make much if any difference, but for myself I have found it helpful to remind myself that love never dies... the love you have for Shelley remains and will always remain, and wherever it is that she is resting peacefully now, she will feel that.

Please come here as often as you wish to talk... you are one of us, one of the great FDMB family always here for each other at times like this.

Fly free, dear little Shelley.
 
MrWorfMen's Mom said:
Anthony, I am so very sorry to hear Shelley has earned her wings. Myheart aches for you. It's so hard to say goodbye to these furry souls who become such an integral part of our lives. They are never with us long enough. You had no way of knowing what was going on with Shelley and making that final decision to let her go with dignity is the most difficult yet most loving gift of all. :bighug::bighug::bighug::bighug:

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RIP sweet Shelley cat_wings>o
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Thank you Linda, I really appreciate your kind and comforting words. It is helping me to see that it was the only thing to do.
 
Diana&Tom said:
I'm just so very very sorry and sad to see this, Anthony. You and Shelley fought so hard and so bravely. Life being what it is, we can never predict how things will turn out and it is so often a shock when we face a sudden situation like this.

Each and every one of us here feels your pain. The loss of a special bond like you had with Shelley is hard to bear and it will take time to fully accept. There are few words at times like this that make much if any difference, but for myself I have found it helpful to remind myself that love never dies... the love you have for Shelley remains and will always remain, and wherever it is that she is resting peacefully now, she will feel that.

Please come here as often as you wish to talk... you are one of us, one of the great FDMB family always here for each other at times like this.

Fly free, dear little Shelley.
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Thank you Diana, you have been a constant and very kind and helpful friend to Shelley and I over the past six months. So generous with your time and always replying so promptly. I am so grateful, it has been invaluable throughout the ups and downs and conflicts that arose.
I will try and think of things in the way you describe. I know it would be a comfort, to try and see things differently.
Thank you so much.
 
Hi Anthony. I read about Shelley's recent health issues. You were the best parent she could have ever. She was loved and she knew it. That is all our kittehs can hope for.

May your sweet kitteh fly freely and land softly at the Bridge. She will be missed.:rb_icon:
 
JeffJ said:
Hi Anthony. I read about Shelley's recent health issues. You were the best parent she could have ever. She was loved and she knew it. That is all our kittehs can hope for.

May your sweet kitteh fly freely and land softly at the Bridge. She will be missed.:rb_icon:
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Thank you JeffJ, your kind words are a comfort. I might not have always got it right but I always had her best interests at heart.
 
Anthony Morgan said:
Thank you JeffJ, your kind words are a comfort. I might not have always got it right but I always had her best interests at heart.
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Anthony, I really do hope you're not feeling too bad about what you did or didn't do... we absolutely know how sad and bereft you feel, and that's natural, painful as it is. But please don't let yourself go down the "didn't always get it right" road. You did 100% the very best you could and that's all any of us can ever do. Believe me, we ALL have stories revolving round "if only I had..." or "why didn't I..."... Such feelings are part of the way we deal with shock and grief.

I don't know how much experience you have had of loss and this is not intended to be a question, nor to make you feel anything but reassured... but everything you are going through is exactly what we all go through after a loss. Grief is a complex set of emotions and there is often a pattern to the different feelings we experience. Some of us have studied this in some depth, having been knocked sideways by the loss of our nearest and dearest, and wanting to make some sense of it. There are no answers as such, we just live through the stages in our own way and in our own time. But I do know that self-blame and guilt are very common indeed, almost always without foundation. So please don't think for a moment you could have done more for your dear Shelley. It was very obvious from when you first started posting here what a very caring and commited kitty parent you are.

Please be very kind to yourself, Anthony. We don't want you to feel any worse than you do. Be sad, but don't feel bad. If you feel like pouring out your feelings you can also of course post on the Grief forum. I've spent a lot of time therre over the years. It is a gentle and comforting place, and can be a very helpful way to feel you are not alone.

We are all with you as you tread this path...
 
Diana&Tom said:
Anthony, I really do hope you're not feeling too bad about what you did or didn't do... we absolutely know how sad and bereft you feel, and that's natural, painful as it is. But please don't let yourself go down the "didn't always get it right" road. You did 100% the very best you could and that's all any of us can ever do. Believe me, we ALL have stories revolving round "if only I had..." or "why didn't I..."... Such feelings are part of the way we deal with shock and grief.

I don't know how much experience you have had of loss and this is not intended to be a question, nor to make you feel anything but reassured... but everything you are going through is exactly what we all go through after a loss. Grief is a complex set of emotions and there is often a pattern to the different feelings we experience. Some of us have studied this in some depth, having been knocked sideways by the loss of our nearest and dearest, and wanting to make some sense of it. There are no answers as such, we just live through the stages in our own way and in our own time. But I do know that self-blame and guilt are very common indeed, almost always without foundation. So please don't think for a moment you could have done more for your dear Shelley. It was very obvious from when you first started posting here what a very caring and commited kitty parent you are.

Please be very kind to yourself, Anthony. We don't want you to feel any worse than you do. Be sad, but don't feel bad. If you feel like pouring out your feelings you can also of course post on the Grief forum. I've spent a lot of time therre over the years. It is a gentle and comforting place, and can be a very helpful way to feel you are not alone.

We are all with you as you tread this path...
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Thank you Diana, that is very good of you and reassuring. And I really appreciate the care and support from yourself and everyone.
I know it wasn't a question but yes, I have been through this before and I know that time does help with the pain.
I am doing OK actually but every now and then you think about something and you have to remind yourself about why you got to that point and why you took that decision.
But as I say I have been through it before and I sure things will get easier this time in due course.
Thank you again for all your care and support!
 
Oh Anthony I am so very sorry to hear your heartbreaking news. I was abroad at the time and didn't see your post until now, I'm so sorry!
Tears were rolling down my face reading about your last few days. My heart goes out to you as I know that you were the best, most caring and gentle parent any kitty could ask for and I have always admired you for your affectionate dedication.
You and Shelley had such an amazing close relationship, something really special to cherish in your memories forever.
Thinking of you Anthony, I hope you are doing ok.
 
Monica Lewis said:
Oh Anthony I am so very sorry to hear your heartbreaking news. I was abroad at the time and didn't see your post until now, I'm so sorry!
Tears were rolling down my face reading about your last few days. My heart goes out to you as I know that you were the best, most caring and gentle parent any kitty could ask for and I have always admired you for your affectionate dedication.
You and Shelley had such an amazing close relationship, something really special to cherish in your memories forever.
Thinking of you Anthony, I hope you are doing ok.
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Hello Monica,
Thank you for your kind message, it is much appreciated. I did try to give Shelley as much help and attention as I could but I sometimes wonder why I didn't see what was so obvious. I saw a picture of her yesterday taken a year ago and the difference between then and her last few weeks was plain to see.
I just think I should have known how ill she was much sooner.
And then I often wonder if I could have kept her going a little longer but on the whole I am OK thank you. I do miss her but I have four other cats to keep me busy.
Although Shelley had a quiet personality she had a presence that was impossible to ignore. I will try and post the earlier picture later on.
Thanks again, your words are very touching and mean a lot to me.
Hope all is well with you and Josie.
Kind regards,
Anthony
 
Hello Anthony,
so good to hear back from you.
I guess you will probably never stop wondering about these things Anthony, things in hindsight always seem much more obvious than when we are in the middle of it.. You did what you felt was the right thing to do at the time and I suppose you'll always question whether it was the right call or not. I feel if they want to go and ready to go then we should let them go. I think trying to keep them around longer would be more for us who are not ready to let them go just yet.. You did the right thing by doing what was best for her. She will be waiting for you at the Rainbow Bridge to meet again.

Your pain will never really go away you'll just learn to live with the hurt and the little hole that the loss of Shelley left in your heart.

Please feel free to share any thoughts and photos you wish anytime, we will always be pleased to hear from you.
 
Monica Lewis said:
Hello Anthony,
so good to hear back from you.
I guess you will probably never stop wondering about these things Anthony, things in hindsight always seem much more obvious than when we are in the middle of it.. You did what you felt was the right thing to do at the time and I suppose you'll always question whether it was the right call or not. I feel if they want to go and ready to go then we should let them go. I think trying to keep them around longer would be more for us who are not ready to let them go just yet.. You did the right thing by doing what was best for her. She will be waiting for you at the Rainbow Bridge to meet again.

Your pain will never really go away you'll just learn to live with the hurt and the little hole that the loss of Shelley left in your heart.

Please feel free to share any thoughts and photos you wish anytime, we will always be pleased to hear from you.
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Thank you Monica, I appreciate that very much.
 
So sorry to hear this. :(

Shine bright sweet Shelley.

Much love and strength to you Anthony xxx
 
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