It's done.
I have a headache from crying and clenching my jaw. The vet said that she would not have agreed to do this, if she didn't agree with me that it was time. If she sees a kitty and she knows it still possible, she will say you know, we really need to try this this and this first. She very much agreed that his age, and all these symptoms that came up last night, she said this is not the kitty she saw two weeks ago. It makes me feel better, that it was the right decision.
Photos before she got here. The three of us hanging out, as we do. We still are. A friend came by tonight and is coming tomorrow morning to dig a hole for me. Vet said it's fine it's cool weather.
I know you guys are going to have many kind things to say, cuz that's the kind of people you are. Djamila, I'm still down with getting together next week. The Lantus can't be returned. Of course I can donate all the stuff to a clinic or even give it to Dave the vet, but I would appreciate any suggestions, should I try diabetic cats in need, or you guys, is there anyone here who has financial pressures for whom it would be a lessening of a burden to receive needles, insulin, etc.?
@Kris & Teasel, if it isn't a burden, and please tell me if it is, maybe you'd be willing to be the point person on that, or suggest someone who can?
Going to turn this off for a while, but I'm not Vanishing. Thanks for all your kind words. I'm going to read a book and hang out with Java's body and Lily and drink some water to replenish all the water I cried out.
Hugs. He was a special cat and I loved him a lot. My beautiful boy.