Looking back across the week, I just don't know what to say.
A lot of little things added up to a big deal, basically. Here is what I think happened....
Living in an apartments, right off of the courtyard, we are always fighting fleas. We had them under control for a couple of months, until about a week or so. Sudden explosion of fleas.
Monday night or Tuesday morning, I kept catching Shorty sitting in the tub.
I'm not concerned with his numbers, around this time, AMPS caused us to delay his shot around this time too. I think we're doing good.
Wed, we weren't home most of the day. He only ate about half of his dinner that night, and when I gave him his shot, the needle actually dragged and caught on his skin on the way out. I just thought, bad needle.
Thu morning, no eating, low BG, took in to vet early afternoon. Dehydrated, ketones, BG wasn't too high in my opinion, since he hadn't gotten his shot, and had sat in the waiting room with a 50 lb dog barking the whole time. No shot, plus stress, 300 isn't a terrible number, I think.
Fast forward to getting home from burying Shorty Tuesday, and I sat and watched as Nunu and Stretch would look at the water bowl from the desk, or the coffee table, but wouldn't go to it. I walked over, thinking maybe there is something floating in it, and get jumped by about 15 fleas right by the water bowl. And I realize, that Shorty was probably dehydrated for several days, leading to the lower BG numbers. That's why he was sitting in the tub, he was hoping for water without getting into the flea zone. And I had thought he was just being his unique, crazy self. He'd used to just sit anywhere and everywhere, after all. And then the dehydration led to a UTI from the sugar not getting flushed out, and the infection then just compounded the issue for a day or two, until he was DKA.
I'm sure, if we would have taken the offer from the vet, to refer him to an internal specialist at that point, he'd still be here. But I decided to keep him with the office that knew him, had his records, and had experience with him. Monday though, they pretty much said "We can't help him, he needs 24 hour care, an insulin pump, a glucose pump, and hourly checks. We are only here 12 hours a day". What would have happened, if instead of letting them keep him for 4 days, I'd taken him to the 24 hour internal specialist? I had thought the vets offer to refer him was just a challenge on Thursday, with how she acted, especially with her constantly challenging us on both the human meter, and using U-100 needles to fine tune and get more accurate dosages on a U-40 insulin. In hindsight, I should have said "Yup, let's get him out of your care immediately".
I also believe, that since they weren't even attempting any kind of fast acting insulin, and hourly tests and shots, until Monday, that the vets at that clinic were negligent about his DKA. Evidently the clinic's own internal specialist wasn't there over the weekend. We did get verified that they had been giving him potassium and electrolytes the entire time, to help flush the ketones. But from my understanding there was minimal effort to regulate his BG, other than standard testing and insulin treatment, which resulted in minimal / missed insulin shots because of his BG was lower than normal from the lack of eating.
But, well, Monday we had one choice. Empty the bank account, and pay for everything they had done, with barely enough money left to euthanize him. We had another offer, but to walk out of the current vet, and to the other vet, would have cost $1000 more, just for the deposit, with no promises, and no offers of help or discounts or deferral of payment. After being syringe fed for 5 days at that point, IV pump, still refusing food and water, we held him close and ended it.
I keep looking back, blaming myself for missing the dehydration. For not checking his ketones recently. For not having a better vet. For not having more money in savings. For missing all the little things that added up to a big problem. In hindsight, it's so easy to see what went wrong. It's going to take me a while to live with it.