You are not being unreasonable at all. Cats are best regulated at home, unless there's some serious complication in addition to the diabetes that requires hospitalization, such as diabetic ketoacidosis. Since JJ is safely home with you right now, I'm assuming that's not the case!
Here's a link to the current
AAHA recommendations for the treatment of diabetic dogs and cats. Under "Initiating Insulin Therapy", it very clearly says that while it is up to the vet whether they wish to monitor the cat on the first day of insulin (since JJ was already sent home I don't see why it would be necessary), initial treatment should be on an
outpatient basis. Cats have inflated Blood Glucose levels at the vet, so it's pretty much impossible to regulate them until they're home and relaxed. Trying to determine the correct dose at the vet's office is dangerous, because the inflated BG numbers lead to overdosing by the vet. Also, it typically takes several weeks or even months to regulate a cat--it's not something your vet will be able to do in a single week.
Apart from annual or semi-annual bloodwork to watch out for other issues, there's no reason to bring your cat to the vet for diabetic testing if you are testing frequently enough at home. Bandit's been diabetic for almost 7 years, and I've never once payed for a blood glucose curve at the vet or a fructosamine.
Did your vet tell you what insulin he wanted to use? Lantus (glargine) and Levemir (detemir) are the recommended insulin for cats, but Prozinc is also a suitable choice if more flexibility is needed in the schedule. Vetsulin and Novolin (Humulin N) are NOT recommended for cats and should not be used. If Lantus is prescribed, I would ask your vet for a script for the Solostar pens, and order online from a Canadian pharmacy, as it's more than half the price of ordering in the US. A single pack of 5 pens (about $170 after shipping) will last you a year or more. If that is too much to invest in at once, you can also order a single pen for about $75 after shipping. It does usually take a week for the insulin to arrive, but you can use that time to change the diet and learn to home test, if needed. The pens are more economical than the vials because they are smaller--doses for cats are very small and you don't typically get to use all of a vial before it goes bad, and you draw insulin out with syringes just like you do with a vial, so you'll need a script for those as well (and you can get those at any pharmacy--Walmart is usually the cheapest). If money isn't a huge roadblock for treatment for you, you could also get your first vial from a local pharmacy to get you started right away, if that's preferred. You will save yourself several hundred dollars not leaving your cat at the vet to be "regulated", so keep that in mind.