Kristine, you will find a way that works best for you and Eddie. Give it time and try to relax. He will too. I found that out many years ago when we first started out. My hubby would hold him and I would try to poke. Tigger just freaked and didn't understand what was going on. Then my DH went out of town and I was forced to do it by myself. I relaxed, Tigger relaxed and we got blood!
You really do need to make sure the ear is warm. I don't bother with the rice sock anymore, although many still do that here - an individual thing. I use a thin wash cloth, run it under warm water, put it in a sandwich baggie that I keep for just that purpose, then zap it in the microwave for ten seconds. Works fine!
Your lancet gauge is important too. Don't go with too fine a gauge. I tried with a higher gauge (higher means smaller) and settled with a 28 gauge lancet. Some will have success with a higher gauge. Each cat's ears are different. I didn't ever need to use vaseline for instance either, but with a cat with long hair on their ears that would be a good idea.
Plus I don't put anything behind his ear other than my finger. I don't get poked. But, again, this is an individual thing.
In the end what works for you is what is important. Lots of good suggestions here in this thread. Good luck. You will do fine. After a while you will have the routine down and it will be no problem for either of you.
