Hi all,
Me and Sue "talked" about this early today, but then I had to go to work so I'm late to the party.
OK, personally, I don't like the word "expert" at all in regard to anything to do with feline diabetes. I know that some people on the board seem to consider themselves that, but in most cases, it's a word attached to their names by other people who consider them to be the "experts" on whatever subject, whether it's dosing, or whatever.
Let me tell you about my "qualifications" for any of you who haven't been around long enough to remember "Carl the newbie"....
I joined the board last June, a month or so after Bob was diagnosed.
I never once posted asking for advice with dosing. I didn't know who to ask, and I didn't start posting in PZI until just before Bob went OTJ, at which point, I didn't think I needed any advice. I first listened to my vet, who had me upping Bob's dose in .5u or 1u doses every week. Then I found this place, realized that was wrong from reading a lot, and my gut told me he needed less. So I reduced his dose, never said anything directly to the vet, and he went from 4u BID to zero in about 4 more weeks. I "winged it".
I used PZI, and have absolutely no firsthand knowledge of Prozinc. Never even heard of it until I started reading on the PZI forum. As far as I knew, PZI was the only insulin. I found out about the "L" insulins after I joined FDMB.
I used a sliding scale for almost the whole time Bob got PZI, but my sliding scale was very simple. The smallest increment my vet had on her scale was whole unit doses. So Bob got like 2u if he was over 200, and 3u if he was over 300, and god forbid I saw a 400. My instructions were "If he's under 100, call me before you shoot." So 100 was his "no shoot number" from day one. Pretty scary, since 100 is "normal", but Bob got 1u or more when he was just over 100.
I rarely tested Bob at any time other than the preshots. I ran a few curves, but not as a rule. I rarely tested at nadir. Basically, I didn't manage Bob's diabetes "safely". I shot him, went to work, shot him again 10-12 hours later depending on when I had the chance to run by the house and test him and shoot him. The only thing I did "right" was to make sure and never give a shot without a BG test first.
So, all of the above pretty much disqualifies me from ever considering myself an "expert" on dosing. Since Bob went OTJ, I sure have learned a whole bunch about "doing it right", and if he ever relapses, or I one day adopt another sugarcat, I sure will do it "right", because I am unbelievably fortunate that I didn't kill my cat.
Here's my story since....
I read and read and read every day. I learn something new every day. I learn that from all of you in PZI and from Health and Lantus and wherever else I happen to lurk. I do a lot of "googling". When I see a question I don't know the answer to, I look it up, so I can try to help explain what needs to be explained to answer a question.
I love numbers of any kind. I'm a numbers dork. I love baseball, because it's all about numbers. I love music because I can translate it to numbers and logic and patterns. I'm a wiz at MS Excel, I love it because it's all about numbers and formulas and percentages and trends. So I guess I am pretty good at looking at a spreadsheet, looking for patterns, and trying to form logical conclusions. And it isn't "work" to me. I just love doing it.
I also love to deal with "people". I do it for a living. Yeah, I'm a "Park Ranger" and people have a different understanding about what that is exactly. But it is basically "customer service". It's meeting people, sharing nature's miracles with people, talking a lot, answering a zillion questions, and has very little to do with "law enforcement" at all. My "job" is to protect a natural resource and help people understand what it is, and why it is so important to do this. So, all day long, every day, I interact with people, over a million of them a year. And I ABSOLUTELY LOVE MY JOB. Really, it isn't "work" to me. It's just some place I have to be every day, wearing the clothes they tell me I have to wear, and they PAY ME FOR IT!!! And I get to live here for free. Hell, I would do this "job" for free if I didn't need the money to pay for food and clothing and luxuries like cable TV and the internet. So, a place like this board is like that to me. I get to meet and converse with hundreds of people. I meet new people every day. They ask questions, I try to answer them. I love it here.
Here is my primary motivation, and anyone who has had a kitty go OTJ will completely understand this....
I remember how terrified and ignorant I felt the day I heard "Bob has diabetes". I thought it was the end of the road for me and Bob, until the vet said "you can treat this at home, and he can live for many more years as a diabetic". When I heard that, I thought "OK, no sweat, I can do this.....right?" And she said "yes you can".
I also remember the day I found out that remission was a possibility. And the day I first held off on shooting, and he didn't need a shot for like 36 more hours. And then he did, and I was like "OK, close but no cigar, but now that I see it's possible, it's frigging happening for Bob and me". And a couple cycles again, I tried again, and bingo, that was it for Bob and PZI. Anyone who has "been there done that" knows how that feels. It's the greatest feeling in the world. My primary motivation, the reason I am still here every day, is because I want each and every person who posts here as a scared and overwhelmed newbie to feel what I felt that day. I completely understand that this will not happen for everyone. Some cats just won't "get there". BUT, that doesn't stop my wanting it to happen, so I try every day to help people get there. Because I am not special in any way, and neither is Bob. There's nothing that I did that you can't do. The ONLY thing that nobody can control is the dreaded "ECID", but that doesn't mean it can't happen or won't happen for any one cat and bean here. So that's why I continue to do what I do.
Like Sue said, there are lots of people in PZI posting every day, going through this "dance". And you are all more "current" than I am. You're "living it" every day. And each of you is learning something about FD, dosing, food, ketones, constipation, whatever, every day (just like I am). You are dealing with conditions I've never had to deal with, so you know a lot more than I do about them. Micro-dosing? What the hell is THAT? I never did it, and I am amazed that cats respond to .1 doses, or even to adjustments of .1 in a dose that is 1u or higher. I've never touched a U100 syringe. I had a hard enough time trying to eyeball .25 adjustments on the U40's, so I can't fathom "micro-dose adjustments" at all. But a lot of you are doing it. You are a lot more qualified to advise on that than I am. You just might not feel that's true, but it sure as hell is.
Look, all of my advice, on doses or on anything else.....I am nowhere close to "right" a lot of the time. Some times I think I'm 100% right, I give someone advice, and the exact opposite of what I said would happen happens. And I sit here thinking "WHAT????". So I file it in my memory bank and try again.
Nobody wants to be the person that gives someone advice that goes bad. Every time I say "I think an increase is the way to go", I worry that I am going to cause harm to your kitty. Or a decrease for that matter. I think the reason I do advise is because I can't stand to see a question go unanswered, and I can't stand to see someone frozen because they don't know what to do. So I do my best to try to help them decide, and I pray that if they follow my advice, the worst thing that will happen is a couple cycles of sucky numbers.
The only difference between me and some of the newer members is time. How long they've been here, or been dealing with FD treatment. Every one of you, if you were the only person online, and I posted as a scared or confused "newbie".... I know in my heart that you would step up and try to help me choose between one dose or the other. You would, because you remember vividly how it felt the first time you asked the question, and anxiously waited for someone, anyone to answer your call for help. So, you all CAN do what I do, or Sue does, or anyone else who says "I think you should shoot X amount". You all have the experience and the spreadsheet and most importantly, the "caring" attitude that would lead you to give the advice if you were the only person online to offer advice.
So, how much easier is it when the room is "crowded"? It's much easier, I think. That is the basis of the board...peer review. You throw your idea and your reasoning out there, and there are other people who will either agree or disagree with it. The important thing is to get the idea "out there". You could be the one person who is "right", because you have looked and seen something that everybody else has missed. You could have just done the same thing with your cat, and seen it work, and believe it will work for someone else. The worst thing that can happen is that you might be wrong and somebody else is right. But you've given the person asking the question one more option to try or the think about the next time, right?
Too many people on the board sell themselves short. They know more than they think they do, and can be more helpful than they think they can be. It's just scary sometimes hitting the "submit" button, because you really aren't "positive" what you are saying is right. I've been wrong plenty of times. But while it might make me hesitate to post, it won't stop me from offering my opinion because I believe that it will be a heck of a lot more helpful if I say something than if I say nothing at all.
Look, I love every one of you, and I trust every one of you to "be there" when somebody needs help. I'm not any smarter, or wiser, or "expert" than anyone else in this room. I'm just more wordy, and I am probably a little bit more likely to throw it out there than some of you are. But the last thing I ever want PZI to become is some place where a couple or few people are perceived as somehow more "qualified" to offer any kind of advice than anyone else is. I love it when people ask for my opinion, don't ever think otherwise. But I never want PZI to be some place where somebody asks a question, and everyone defers an answer because they are waiting for me to say something. The important thing is that people get helped as quickly as possible, because the person asking needs an answer. If they are brand new, they don't know Carl from Adam, ( or Sue from Eve) so they don't much care who answers their questions, as long as somebody does.
Bottom line - don't hold back. Help the new people, help the old people. And don't sell yourself short.
Carl
