11/22 Reuben 10/31/97 to 11/21/12

Status
Not open for further replies.
Alexa and Reuben

Alexa and Reuben

Member Since 2012
Hello Dear LL Friends -

It is with a heavy heart that I write to thank you all so very much, and let you all know that Reuben died in my arms last night in bed at 11:15pm of advanced intestinal lymphoma. wings_cat

I was absolutely unable to face the truth up until the very end. I lived in my own world with him the last week and a half since the diagnosis that I could not accept. We spent every minute together, and with Zack, denying reality. A couple of days ago I half admitted it to myself, enough to be ready... and I started telling him it was okay to leave - that Zack and I would be okay.

He was in pain at the very end, and I told him it was okay -- that he could leave and the pain would end.

I felt his last breath, and then listened to his last heart beat with my head on his chest.

He loved me more than anyone ever has. So much that he kept his illness at bay for a year until we relocated and got settled, and he knew I would be able to handle this.

I love you Reuben Rey, for ever and ever and ever.

Thank you dear friends for all the good times, good work and good healing we found here.

I will have our FDMB Calendar to remember this amazing experience by.

Bless You All, and Thank You from the bottom of our hearts.

Alexa, Reuben and Zack
 
Oh ((((Alexa)))), I am so sorry to hear this, my heart is breaking for you :cry: . Know the love you and Reuben have for each other will always be with you. cat_pet_icon
Fly free sweet Reuben, relieved from all pain and suffering
wings_cat
 
Thank you Leslie --- I feel so badly about torturing him with the protocol all that time when he was so sick and I didn't know/was too afraid to find out. I finally found the best vet in town the day before he died.

There is irony in that, and in being almost ready for trial...

And all that time he was just on the credenza, it was the cancer... :cry:

Thank you so much Liz :razz:

Please, everyone, err on the side of nervous nellie/overprotective take-every-little-change in behavior seriously...

I couldn`t have saved him from this, it was extremely aggressive... but I could have stopped the protocol and let him enjoy his last month....
 
(((((Alexa)))))

I am so, so sorry. I am stunned and my heart is breaking for you. There just are not enough words and your words said so much. Reuben was and will always be very special. Cats know -- and we just need to be smart enough to listen. You let him know you would be OK and that gave him the freedom he needed to take his leave. I hope he sends you a rainbow from the Bridge so you will know he is safe.

When you are able, this is a tale of why we choose tears -- we know those lives we safeguard and love will not be with us anywhere near long enough. It is a bittersweet tale that a former member here shared with me.

Fly free, Reuben, and land softly. There are many at the Bridge who we love and who will wait with you until you are reunited with the one you love best.

images
 
Oh Sienne, that story is exactly what I need right now... thank you so much :YMHUG: It is so hard to grasp this new reality, and not feel guilty... your kind words and the story are like a soft blanket around my broken heart...
 
Alexa - I am so very sorry for your loss of Reuben. It is never easy, none of ever want to accept what will be. It has been that way for me too, with those that I have had, loved and sadly let pass over to the bridge. My heart breaks for you, I can so udnerstand the pain, the grief, the what if's... Sienne's post is so very poignant and ever so true. I know Reuben will send you a sign that he is safe. All of mine did. I hope that the memories of Reuben will comfort you. He will always be there with you, in your memories, your heart, and your mind's eye.

fly free little one, you will be forever missed.
 

Attachments

  • candle animated.gif
    candle animated.gif
    7.6 KB · Views: 2,202
Thenk you so much Michelle, your lovely words assuage the pain... and the candle, so sweet! I never knew what they were for before... where do I go to see it?

reuben was with me last night right after he left his body, and for a while... cat_pet_icon I hope he is okay today...
 
Alexa, I am so sorry that Reuben had to leave. I'm sure he will be back soon to tell you he is ok. Our hearts break for you. A love story like this has no ending, just changes because it must.
much love ..
Take good care Reuben. You will be forever loved
mary and oliver
 
Alexa, I don't know what to say. I'm shocked and saddened and crying for you over your loss. I just want to give you a gigantic hug. I'm sure Reuben is looking over you and Zack and chasing away all the bugs. He sure was lucky to have you as his bean...and you were lucky to have him as your love. Bless you, Zack and sweet Reuben's soul.

Good Night, Dear Heart

cat-sniffing-candle-600x400.jpg
 
Oh Alexa. I am so very sorry. ((((Hugs)))). Reuben loved you and Zack more than anything but is now pain free. Fly free little one and land softly.
 
Dear (((((Alexa))))) and (((((Zack))))),
Words fail me. I am so sorry to hear this news. Reuben chose this time because he knew that you were now strong enough to accept his passing. You know that he has never left, he has only moved to a different plane. He is at home in your heart, as always and for always.
We will light Stu's candle for Reuben tonight to help him find his way to the Bridge. And when we look up to the heavens, we'll be able to see his star shining brightly.

Fly free, sweet Reuben, and land softly at the Bridge, where all of our GAs will welcome you. Send your mamabean a sign that you are OK, free of pain, and let her know that you will watch over her and Zack until you meet again.

In deepest sympathy,

Ella and Edward, Rusty, and Stu (GA)
 
I am heartbroken to read this ((((((Alexa)))))) You were truly a wonderful mom to Reuben and it touched my heart to read how he hid his illness from you. Fly free sweet Reuben, you were loved will be dearly missed by your LL family. wings_cat
 
Dear dear Alexa,

Words can't express how sorry I am for your loss of sweet Reuben. I really was shocked when I saw your post. I didn't expect this. He was doing so well. You were a wonderful pet parent and tried only to heal him. It had to feel better for him to have those symptoms under control anyway. You know in your heart that you have nothing to feel guilty for and Reuben knows everything you did was out of love. Don't torture yourself for no reason. It's hard enough to grieve and miss the one you love. You did what you thought best. What more could you do? Reuben was loved and happy and lucky to have you.

Hugs,
Melanie & Racci
 
Dearest Alexa,

I am so very sorry to hear this. I could not be more sad for you.

I prefer to think that everything you did for him (and I did for Max) helped rather than hurt. You may have made the experience easier for him by treating him for diabetes, no?

Max will see Reuben at the bridge and they will play together while they wait for us to arrive.

Dale
 
So sorry for your loss Alexa & Zack. Our cats are intelligent, they have their own agenda & plan. Reuben brought you here so that you'll get to know all of us on LL. You've done what is best for him. Set him free is the greatest love & I am so proud of you.
Separation is hard, but as Buddhist we believe all these beings will be around us forever, they remain within our circle. They merely migrated to a different form. Pls take care.
 
(((((((((Alexa))))))))))
I am also surprised to hear this. So unexpected.
I'm sorry that this dreaded time had to come. Reuben knows how much you love him.
I would think that the FD treatment was helping other parts of his body to feel better, especially the starving aspect of it all.
Reuben had so much of your time and devotion and he is all the better for it. He had all your love poured into his very being.
Fly free , Reuben. You were special to us all .
4041689-30181-burning-candle.jpg
 
((((((((Alexa and Zack))))))))) I am so sorry for your loss. Know that Reuben knows how much you love him, and he loves you too.
He will be waiting at The Bridge for you to join him, someday.

images

Fly Free Beautiful One.
 
((((Alexa)))) My heart is breaking for your sorrow. You did everything for Reuben and you couldn't have treated his diabetes any differently than you did. You gave him the gift of you, the gift of time, the gift of love which allowed him to cross into a lovely place of no pain. Mike and I, Gus, Gracie, and Tobey, all send our very deepest condolences to you. Your boy will always be with you.....always in your heart and he will always love you best.

From ee cummings:

I carry your heart with me (I carry it in my heart)
I am never without it (anywhere I go you go, my dear:
And whatever is done by only me is your doing, my darling)
I fear no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet)
I want no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
And it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant
And whatever a sun will always sing is you

Here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that’s keeping the stars apart

I carry your heart (I carry it in my heart)

A Candle for Reuben
 
((((Alexa)))) My heart is breaking reading this post. You are the best of beans. You made what time Reuben had as good as possibly could be.

Take care of yourself and Zack, you will need each other more for a while. :YMHUG: :YMHUG: Every time I turn to June in the calendar, I will be thinking of you and your beautiful boy.
 
(((Alexa)))I am so very sorry and saddened to hear about Reuben. My heart and prayers go out to you. You were the most dedicated MomBean and did everything you could to help Reuben. All the GA kitties will be waiting to help Reuben cross over. I will light my GA kitty Mikey's candle for Reuben. (((Hugs)))
 
Alexa,

We are so very sad to hear this news. I hope you will find strength knowing you've done everything you can. You were very dedicated and it's clear Reuben felt that dedication and love, and hung on as long as he could. Peace will come in time. Know this.

Stay strong,
Jill
 
I am so very sorry to read your sad condo,.....I hope that the beautiful memories that you and Reuben shared will comfort you through the years until you meet once again....
My condolences at this very tearful time..... (((Alexa)))
Fly Free Dear Reuben.... wings_cat
 
Alexa, I'm so sorry for your loss of Reuben. Reuben and you were very lucky to be able to spend his last minutes together. I'm sure it made his leaving more comforting for him. He'll forever be in your heart and he left you with a lot of memories to recall whenever the pain of loosing him gets to much.
wings_cat
 
Oh Alexa. I am so sad for you and Zack as you have had to say good-bye to your dear Reuben. Words fail at times like this but I wanted you to know we are thinking of you and praying for healing in this time of loss. Reuben knew how much you loved him and how faithfully devoted you were to his care.

:YMHUG: Karen
 
Alexa, you did everything for Reuben. The TR eased his FD so at least that pain was set aside in the end. He was your protector to the end, seeing you to a settled place. Think of him as free and playing with our other GAs while he awaits your reunion at the Bridge.

Lighting a candle for Reuben.
 
I don't post on here much anymore but do read and know what loss you're going through.

Please don't feel guilty about anything - we love our furry companions and we do the best we know to do for them - and then there is a time when we can do no more - Reuben left you filled with much love from you and knowing how much you cared. I know what a hole he leaves behind in your life and heart.

My heart goes out to you and I'm sending many comforting prayers.

Emmy & Dude (in spirit) & Mittsi too
 
I'm so sorry Alexa that you lost your sweet boy. I'm glad that you got to spend so much time with him and he left you in your arms feeling loved. My sympathy's to you and Zack.

Fly Free Sweet Reuben rb_icon
Many beloved kitties will meet you at the bridge.
 
Dear dear Alexa and Zach - I am so sorry for your loss and my heart is breaking for you and with you. Please don't feel that you made him suffer, you didn't. You gave him love, happiness, a good home and cared for him so gently. He knows this and I hope he soon come to you to let you know he is ok.

wings_cat wings_cat Fly free Reuben and land softly!

Jo, Bobby and Scratchie!
 
It is with deepest sadness that I tell you how sorry we are for your loss--We are going through something similar with Moonie as you know..She has some kind of intestinal tumor also...Every day is precious, every minute counts...But How Lucky We have been to have had these wonderful, loving, darling beings in our lives, how Blessed that we could give & receive LOve from a cat who became our whole world, & gave us as much as they got.
I know the deep pain you are feeling, and pray you get some relief in the knowing that Reuben was Loved his whole life and loved you as well...My heart hurts so much for you...Fly Free Reuben, we will miss you.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top