11/26 Atlas AMps 264, +3 355, PM HI!

Yesterday's condo:
viewtopic.php?f=9&t=30644

Sunny day, but very cold today.

Mudcat was sleeping in Krueger's hut on the fireplace last night. Atlas went over and started pestering her. Atlas never did that to Krueger, but I think Attie just wanted to play. Attie never uses the hut or cuddle cup. He really is just too big for them.

Muddy is my little impish fraidy cat. She is the one if I look at her the wrong way she'll go into hiding. Her and Krueger were considered boyfriend & girlfriend even at the shelter. I brought Krueger home first and a few months later went back and got her. They recalled each other right away. Orientation was more for Muddy to get used to me as her and Krueger would chatter, chortle, and coo under the door to each other. Wherever Krueger was...Muddy was there too.

So I am keeping a very watchful eye on her. I don't know if her pain...is like my pain, but I know her best friend too, is gone.

Re: 11/26 Atlas AMps 264, +3 355

Reading this post has taken me back. Went through the same a few years ago when we lost one of the civvies. His sister and BFF missed him so - it was such along haul for her to feel happy again. She eventually did, with lots of cuddle time between the both of us. I hope things will be better for the both of you soon.

Looks like Atlas wants to visit all the other kitties on the pink floor - mine included. I hope they all can find better numbers today.

Re: 11/26 Atlas AMps 264, +3 355

Michelle and Mannie said:

Reading this post has taken me back. Went through the same a few years ago when we lost one of the civvies. His sister and BFF missed him so - it was such along haul for her to feel happy again. She eventually did, with lots of cuddle time between the both of us. I hope things will be better for the both of you soon.

Click to expand...

This was truly so very unexpected. As you all can tell I am having a hardtime dealing with it. So, as often is my obsessive compulsive way ....I have been reading and researching feline lymphoma. Why? He is already gone, the decision was made.

In some ways reading the technical bullets and realizing what the prognosis truly was...even with treatment...I am coming to terms there is and was no cure, no answer. Tumors bigger in size than 3 cm, the prognosis with treatment would have only been another 2.5 months...at a 50% success. Krueger's tumor was clearly much, much larger than that.

For the one cat I surely had always in my lap, my desk jockey with a belly rub...how could I have not felt such a thing? Simply put Krueger's weight concealed his disease. Up until Tuesday night he had not presented any symptoms nor distresses. And even if he had, we still would be writing this today. That...that...is the hard truth of the matter.

I've read enough to start to come to terms with the sudden decision I made. It was just so sudden, so unbelievable. I had to go look some of this information up to understand what happened. What had to happen Wednesday morning.

I had started questioning if all my attention on Atlas, had made me somehow miss Krueger's symptoms. And when I started to think that way...I was becoming resentful and angry about Atlas. I was thinking that I worked so hard to save a life, I lost the light of my life.

But I now see through the information I've read, that is not the case. And much to the contrary that I have been feeling...Krueger had joy and there was nothing more this feeble world could give to extend it.

Re: 11/26 Atlas AMps 264, +3 355

you've been on my mind a lot. you can't second-guess yourself and I hope reading about lymphoma after the fact eases your mind. It is human nature, I think, to feel "shoulda, coulda, woulda"

I'm so very sorry about Kreuger and I hope you and the mudcat can help each other feel better about his loss.

Re: 11/26 Atlas AMps 264, +3 355

I know nothing anyone can say really helps, all I can say is that it is good that you are at least starting to come to terms with this - and understanding that no-one is to blame. That has to stand you in good stead, as the shock turns into grief in the days ahead - as it surely must.

I wish you, Muddy and Atlas nothing but the best and am glad that you are there for each other now.

Re: 11/26 Atlas AMps 264, +3 355

fully with you on the second guessing while grieving...and holding all 3 of you in our hearts...

Again,,,,HI! Holding the dose through the rebound isn't controlling the rebound.

oh my, and so sorry for the HI - been there with Mannie a couple of times. I could never figure it out - why the HI. I hope it clears quickly, that he can find better numebrs.

I too have been thinking about you guys alot - I know in time it will be better for you. There really is so little that you could have done that would have changed things, or altered your decision on that Wednesday. I have had so many cats over the years, loved every one of them as much as the other, and lost just as many to inexplicable diseases, unexpected diseases. It will get better in time. remember the good of Kruger, find comfort in Muddy and Atlas. Together you can be whole again.

You're not a vet. Sometimes, we're lucky enough to notice something that may be fixable. Sometimes not. A vet knows what to look for and how something should or shouldn't feel. You made a decision that preserved Krueger's quality of life. That is no small gift. Doing the reading that your doing will allow you to pass that knowledge along. That's a good legacy to Krueger.

You're other furfaces need you. You can grieve together. I'm sure they know you're sad.

I don't know if Blue maybe went lower during a PM cycle. Typically, a bounce shouldn't last more than 72 hours -- but ECID. If Atlas' numbers don't improve, you can increase tomorrow.